Conan O'Brien Needs a Doctor While Eating Spicy Wings | Hot Ones

what's going to happen what's wrong with

you people you don't know what real

danger looks like

[Music]

anymore hey what's going on everybody

for first week Feast I'm Sean Evans and

you're watching hot ones it's the show

with hot questions and even hotter wings

and today we close out season 23 with

Conan O'Brien he's an em awardwinning

talk show host who had nearly three

decade long run on late night you can

keep up with him these days on Conan

O'Brien needs a friend wherever you get

your podcast he also has a brand new

travel show visiting Conan fans all over

the world it's called Conan O'Brien must

go and it's set to release on Max April

18th Conan O'Brien welcome to the show

Sean thanks for having me I appreciate

it I ask in good faith how are you

around hot sauce before we get started I

grew up in an Irish house uh and an

Irish Catholic home in Boston I never

saw a spice till I was about 52 years

old so um terrible with hot food I I

grew up on tasteless food so this is a

whole new experience for me

[Music]

if you don't mind Sean I'd like to get a

quick uh Baseline read uh I brought my

personal physician Dr ooyo this is Dr or

Royal Hi how are you amazing hi nice to

meet you you don't have to talk to him

just to me um just get a Baseline

temperature what are we looking at 97.8

97.8 I run a little cool yeah um also

been my doctor for about 25 years yeah

yeah where did you go to medical school

uh in

1998 where where oh um out of

state you should go

okay I

apologize Dr Ro Royo he's not the best

but he's very affordable

okay all

right getting nothing

here

nothing absolutely nothing is this what

you got I guess this is where you start

right I don't fear your wings

man bring what you got okay so the

travel log is taken I keep these go

ahead go

ahead little good spot for him yeah so

the travel log has taken on so many

different forms from the anthropological

approach of someone like Anthony bouran

to the thrill seeking perspective of a

personality like bear GRS how would you

define comedy's role in the genre like

is it a hack being funny and connecting

with new people and cultures I love

travel and my mission is that you learn

nothing about the country my job is that

you know less about the country after

I'm done than when I started so that's

why I love this new show is Max just let

us go for it and uh we visited a bunch

of countries and uh you're Dumber you're

Dumber after you see the show but we had

a lot of fun was there anything

intentional about releasing the show on

your birthday or is that just a Charming

coincidence thank you for doing your

research um it was a total coincidence

HBO Max called us is it HBO Max or just

max I think it's just straight Max I

can't get used to it it's not a better

name anyway uh Max said um max that

really rolls off the tongue doesn't it

it is kind of personal cuz it's just

like someone's name you know I me pi Max

this said hey you're you're going to

drop I think that's what the kids say uh

on April 18th and I said hey that's my

birthday and they went huh so I don't

think it was anything intentional it

just happened to be my birthday well

happy birthday to you co thank you so

much and thank you for having me

appreciate it are you ready to move on

here to Sauce number two on that note

please cuz that first one I got nothing

what's this what kind of sauce is this

so this one is called Smokey J here

Smokey J Smokey J anything I need to

know about this sauce before I bite in I

think the less you know the better

[Music]

okay okay smokey

J I like this so far I am unfazed do you

mind if I yeah no go ahead your jack

your wings take ownership from that side

of the table go ahead how often do you

show up on location somewhere right you

get to a destination and your first an

immediate thought is how the hell am I

going to make this funny often that's

70% 70% of the time and what I call it I

talked to my headwriter Mike Sweeney and

I say you've brought me to a comedy

vacuum there's nothing here you there's

nothing once we were doing a shoot in

Finland and I was in the Arctic Circle

and I was standing on a tundra and in

the distance about 400 yards away with

some

reindeer and my producers just said and

go

and I'm looking

around I'm like what what am I supposed

to do improv with a sheet of ice but in

those situations sometimes when you

think it's going to go very badly it

goes well sometimes you think oh my God

I have it made this is a perfect remote

and you can't get anything so it's

always going to a Vegas crafts table you

never

know again it's called hot ones

what the [ __ ] going on this is nothing

I'll remember you got nothing I'll

remember these words

going God is going to get he's going to

have a hot this isn't even I've yet to

had any spice at all and you know what

I've got a little eye watering I think

you're going to cuz you're meeting your

idol I think that's what's happening I I

get that from just about everyone in

your demographic right eyes Che up yeah

go ahead there you go got three in there

y so on a late night show when you see

the host toss a commercial right and

then they lean in and they talk to the

guest with the mic's cut yeah is that

usually like a real chat and if so what

are some of the go-to depends on host in

the old days back in the days when I was

doing it and there was just a couple of

us uh often times there wasn't much chat

really not much at all you know if you

were talking to a letterman he wouldn't

say too much the other guy you know I

don't know where he was but I always to

make something happen I tried to keep

the rhythm going and sometimes if I

couldn't get them interested I'd try and

say something provocative like I bet you

live four more years tops and you could

see them get a little rattled and the

band would be playing but I just wanted

to keep them alert but I remember I said

that to B Arthur and I was right B

Arthur you said that to B Arthur yeah I

said four years tops and it was uh 3

years 11 months and S some time yeah

well I'll say this I know you uh this is

important for me to say I've watched

your show you are a very good

interviewer than and um so without this

this is fun I like this and I get why

you guys do it and it's really fun and

it's compelling but uh you are a very

serious interviewer you take it

seriously and you ask really good

questions so I I'm very impressed with

your dedication to it damn yeah wow yeah

you'll cut that out that won't make it

in no laughs

there

what is this called this is uh Los

centes very Los centes okay very

nice Dr ro royal yes sir get a baseline

pulse here it's getting it's starting to

race a little bit sure

sure you're you're just chical you're

just choking me so sorry no no you just

feel for the pulse all right yeah just

you've been with me for a long time but

it's there okay there he's very good

very inexpensive I can tell yeah he has

a office in the

desert what do you think is the most

annoying trait or thing a guest can do

when appearing on a talk show the worst

thing a guest can do is tell the

audience it's not going well I've seen

it happen many times it's an amateur

move uh because the host can do a lot to

let people think it's going great even

if it's not that there are many things

the host can do the host can be enjoying

the host can act a little bit the host

can do things audiences want to see a

good show they want to see a good

interview and uh I was always amazed

when someone would come out and they'd

be doing okay and they'd make a couple

of jokes and it's fine and then they

would just go and they would look right

out the camera and they would

say this just isn't going very well is

it and you could feel I would look out

at the audience maybe 200 people sitting

there and I'd see 200 Souls leave 200

bodies and float up through the ceiling

because they were they were just told

they were not getting a good show right

no that's not show business show

business is you're getting the greatest

show in the

[Music]

world I don't think there's a Wing here

that I can't eat like it's ice cream I I

seriously I don't think there's a Wing

on this table that I cannot devour like

it's cool whipped cream on an August

afternoon okay you're like a Ric Flair

cutting a promo right now all right

that's the energy that I'm picking up on

yeah you're really challenging the Wings

Over Dr Royal please could you step

in my pocket's getting full

[Music]

oh is there a most heroine encounter

with Wildlife that you can recall from

all the times that you had animal

experts on the show yes it happened

during the Turner phase of of my career

we uh had someone who brought a lot of

animals on and one of them was a water

buffalo massive beast and I'm standing

next to to it and I said well I don't

even know what we do with it and someone

a producer just said well just hop up on

it I'm in rehearsal mode so you just do

what you're told and as I'm getting up

on it Andy said don't get on that but of

course I never listen to Andy you got to

commit to the so I get up on the water

buffalo and as my ass hits the water

buffalo beats this size it freaks it

tosses me up into the air we had it on

camera I go up and I come down on my hip

on a cement floor floor and as you know

in a studio cement it's poured concrete

so the cameras can roll so I bounce off

my hip it really [ __ ] hurt water

buffalo makes this bellowing sound

charges everyone runs away all the

cameraman run away takes out a camera

camera people are scrambling and slips

and Falls then gets up and looks at me I

am lying on the floor I jump and I run

in the other direction and leap over the

talk show couch I had a hematoma on my

hip that was so big I couldn't get my

jeans on or off so they like had to cut

me out of my jeans it was this

giant and I just kept thinking why it's

because you do a show every

day you get into the let's go let's go

um let's get this thing going and I'm

there and I'm just thinking about the

next thing and a voice just said hop on

and I did false sense of security just

the rhym of the show AB idiocy but um I

live to tell the tale and the water

buffalo and I made amends we're good

now m m great fantastic I it I love it I

love it I don't know I don't see what

the problem is I know you might be

running out of pockets thankfully you do

have a lot of them over there it's okay

we got pockets do you take any kind of

perverse pride in the sheer number of

hours of Television that you've created

I was never that excited about about

volume it to me it's whether it's good

or not or you know and and so to me it

was much more stay focused on let's

really try and keep trying to make

something that's really memorable and

will stick around and and then get back

to it and what I'm interested in is how

it looks in the rear view for you like

does it all fit neatly into distinct

eras or is it all kind of a blur I would

say there are eras as the early era '93

to '95 where I'm uh in living in sheer

Terror all the time because

I'm waiting for a phone call any second

that I've been canceled so that is a

real era that whole run rocker Center

feels like an era all the craziness I

went through in whatever 2010 is a

distinct chapter Turner is a distinct

chapter um getting to do the podcast

which I love sitting down and getting to

talk to somebody for an hour is such a

joy after almost three decades of that

was great thanks a lot okay we're going

to take a little break we'll be right

back

you know that uh that I loved it but I

love this a lot kind of musle it's

different now and I love trying this and

then with this new Max show coming out

April 18th um I just like that we're

really getting the resources to do one

of these the way I always wanted to do

it so uh yeah I would say they they look

like very distinct separate

times my my hands are all hold on a sec

Dr

Royo can you open this

please multifaceted doctor thank you

Doctor

whoa what's going to happen what's wrong

with you people you don't know what real

danger looks like

anymore

incredible no

so my question to

you is is there a point when these get

warm just a little bit warm anything at

all incredible incredible oh here's a

question for you yes is it true that

while writing at SNL that you would

sometimes go downstairs to Letterman's

6A studio and then write material from

his desk at the studio I would sit they

had like a a covering over his desk to

protect it from any [ __ ]

and so we were uh our Studios were at 9:

and I would go down to uh he was in 6A

which is the studio I eventually took

over but I didn't know that was going to

happen and I would sit at Dave's desk

and I had Dave's perspective and I would

sit there and I would work on a sketch

and then this crazy situation develops

one in a billion chance where I get a

chance to audition for that show and

then get it but if you would told me

that when I was sitting behind Dave's

desk as a Saturday live writer i' have

said there's no way i' have also said

there's no way there's ever going to be

a Charlie Rose show where you eat hot

wings but I've been I would have been

wrong both times that's exactly right

yeah you can't predict the future you

just don't know what's going to happen

connect the dots looking back never

looking forward when you took over that

6A Studio did you see any remnants of

the Old Guard were there like pencils

stuck in the ceiling or no cuz they put

us in different offices so we were not

in Dave's offices but we had his Studio

there weren't remnants but there were

physical remnants there were people

there were camera people there was this

guy Bailey who was a cameraman who had

been with Dave the whole time and so he

was our cameraman I'll never forget that

we kept coming up with these ideas that

were much more involved a lot of running

around I was kinetic Robert's kinetic

the writers we hired were very kinetic I

would just turn 30 so all my ideas were

I've got an idea I start running and the

camera's running with me and I jump out

the window and the cameraman jumps too

and Bailey who had been there probably

since the 50s and was used to watching

you know shooting I don't know some

Edward armur smoke a cigarette down to

the filter no filter no filter it's

Edward armur godamn it that's what he

was used to and then suddenly I'm here

saying I've got an idea Bailey we're

going to put rockets on your feet and

you're going to fire you down the hall

how old you Bailey 77 yeah it's going to

be fun Bailey

fun

Aro get that open my hands are very

slippery of course it was it a fouryear

medical school it was supposed to

be there you go did you ever

graduate he's

gone oh my

God oh my

gosh oh my

gosh come on man are we doing this or

not yeah no I'm with are we doing it or

not no I'm on the same page what's the

point of even being alive if we can't do

this right now I really do feel alive I

do feel alive you're okay yeah yeah I'm

with you I'm with you yeah I might

hiccup through this whole thing yeah

this one I'm not going to lie I'm

feeling it a little

bit I'm feeling it I'm feeling this one

little it's just starting to peek

through you know be a little bit I can't

stop a little bit of a burning but not

much

what you as president do you think would

be the best podcast guest on Conan

O'Brien needs a friend say you you tried

to talk y but your lips have been

paralyzed and what I heard

was I got that out I think maybe you're

having a problem hear no I don't think

it I think everyone in the studio will

agree which US president do you think

would make the best podcast guest on

Conan O'Brien needs a friend do they

have to be living no Richard Nixon Nixon

oh my God be fantastic he's such a

comedy figure when you think about it Bo

and we could get into water and then he

would try to be funny like I've got a

funny idea you know it' be fantastic The

Voice alone I would have to say probably

uh Lincoln can I just take a second and

say this is starting to

hit I think no yeah can I just say I

know I don't have a lot of regrets in my

career pouring this onto the wing right

and then licking it off and in

retrospect I bet you it's good footage

no yeah it's good good TV um I'm

starting to feel some Sensations and and

you know what Conan if you weren't so

braggadocious in this front half I

probably would have stopped you from

doing that you know I would have

protected you from yourself you can't

stop me from being who I am that's

exactly right so quote my my hero poey I

am what I am okay I said it and Gandhi

said it and and papey that is the that

is who I am I've got to go for it

whatever I do I have to go I you got to

commit to the bit Comm it's not a bit

this is life bit to you it's not a bit

it's your show don't say commit to the

bit this is light you got to grab it by

the balls Dr Royal would you check on my

friend here just get a quick

test yeah it's not good not good do you

have anything beyond that no he's okay

I'll just take you at face value on that

not good yeah yeah he's he's not a good

doctor he's he's an a affordable doctor

do you have a a favorite mediocre

president uh well that's a good one

mediocre president that's so mean I'm

going to go with Warren Hardy okay

goodlooking guy he was in the Oval

Office like 3 days and he wrote on a

note I am not fit to be president this

job is too hard and then to solve

matters he takes a train trip and dies

mysteriously cuz he ate some bad Lobster

so you got to give it up for Warren G in

in my opinion right don't you think no

argument there yeah he knew he couldn't

do the job and said you know what has

anyone got some Lobster that's been out

too long I want to eat it on a train

where there's no refrigeration and

that's what they

did don't do it don't do the sauce

what's on the saw I can't get this

open there we go and a little bit of

this on it yeah go I'll join you at the

that's the sound the three stoes used to

make when they were doing anything

destructive everyone watchs with three

stoes yeah yeah

yeah

mistake I wait to announce my mistakes

up front go this is not a mistake

nothing about this is a mistake every

step of the way

intentional

incredible

oh my

God oh my God someone said oh my god oh

yeah

yeah

yeah I've never felt that alive that's I

love it I love it me tooed for the first

time in 15 years this is to youy to you

call the

[Music]

wife

okay yeah you got to I mean at this

point what are you going to do this is

what's tell us what we're eating here so

this is the last AB experience it is

made with almost pure

peppera incred oh my gosh I got to join

you at the party going out with a bang

you got to go isn't this the season

finale you're exactly right there needs

to be a fireworks display to close

things

out

okay here we go ready I'm

ready oh my

gosh you say this is pure pepper

mhm so there's nothing here there's no

insulation there's no safety now

no straight concentrated pepper to the

Dome

incredible incredible I'm not getting it

I'm just not getting it oh my God

what's wrong with me why can't I feel no

is it going to hit me now it's going to

hit me soon right it's got a build on it

it's got a build it's starting to build

right now yeah yeah oh it's building

yeah and it's kind of not going to stop

no this isn't going to stop but that's

okay I got a little bit of a wind up

yeah it's coming fast I know I know it's

coming fast we're approaching the the

peak of the mountain here but Conan

O'Brien the good news is that's a wrap

on our lunch date with the wings of

death we're here about to

drop I'm fine I'm perfectly [ __ ] fine

I'm not come up one that had any effect

on Conan cuz he's here to stay

ohooo if you are crafting a curriculum

of a comedy survey course can you give

us one book to make sure that your

students understand that the building

blocks of Comedy are not at all new what

are you going to

read read widely and read well there's

comedy in the Old Testament there's

comedy in the New Testament you can read

all kinds of stuff just don't lock

yourself in to it's got to be some

comedy from the last 10 years no there's

great comedy out there that was written

a long time ago what's funnier than Don

kote Sano

Panza you know this is good stuff the

classics are funny you know you can want

read Cher's Tales they're funny there's

funny everywhere don't be a snob look

high and look low a Mad Magazine is

funny there's funny stuff online all the

time there's no reason for us to try and

exclude one category over another these

aren't the rantings of someone who's had

some bad chemicals and overdid it to be

funny and relevant to people who were at

least 50 years younger than him this is

a guy who's just being on a show and

it's legitimate so I say Here's to You

Sean you're a great [ __ ] host

right back and I'm glad I'm here and I'm

glad we had a great time and I don't

care I don't care anymore wise words

from a wise and stable

man who's doing everything he can wings

of death to be on the show that everyone

young wants to be on just barely

enough's nothing left to do but roll out

the red carpet for you this camera this

camera this camera let the people know

what you have going on in your

life I have show it's on Max they used

to call it HBO but people found that too

popular so now it's Max cuz that really

rolls off the tongue and it's a funny

show four episodes are going to drop at

me going all over the world you can

check it out April 18th that's right my

intestines have turned into acid and I

can still remember the plug that's a

professional if there was a mic drop I'd

do one but I do a wing drop April 18th

check it

[Applause]

out Dr

Royo oh God

huh yeah that's not good that's dead

either you're not a doctor are you I I

should be

okay all right thank

you was he going to tell you what it's

at no he doesn't even understand the

numbers it it's up two degrees from when

the start of the show no lie that's the

I was

after I love how you ruined me but saved

your suede jacket well I was literally I

literally just bought I know I know I

know I don't trust me I love that jacket

and I do not want to get any on it you

know the Jack admire a guy who hosts hot

ones and wears beautiful

suede oh

yeah camera guy Bill here for a spicy PS

say here at hot ones we love sports

baseball

football go long touch

basketball heck and even fancy horseback

riding and we know you spice Lords are

tuned in too so the next time you need a

little snack to go with your sports make

sure to make it a hot ones Buffalo

Bonanza our hot ones buffalo sauce is

made with real butter cayenne pepper and

even a little bit of celery it's the