Happy Pi Day! | Will Trump’s VP Pick Be A Democrat? | Elon Musk Cancels Don Lemon’s X Show

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
15 Mar 202411:08

Summary

TLDRThe Late Show host Steven Colar discusses various topics, including the 2024 election, Trump's claims of unfair treatment, his search for a vice president, and his views on NATO funding. The script also covers Trump's personal struggles, his take on the Deep State, and his recent legal issues regarding classified documents. Additionally, the show touches on Don Lemon's new venture and a Montana rancher's illegal breeding of giant sheep hybrids.

Takeaways

  • 🎤 The Late Show is hosted by Steven Colar and aired on March 14th, celebrating Pi Day.
  • 🏆 Pi is recognized as the official irrational number of the 2024 election cycle.
  • 🚀 Trump secured the Republican nomination and discussed his treatment in the media during an interview with Greg Kelly on Newsmax.
  • 🗣️ Trump expressed feeling unfairly treated, comparing himself to Andrew Jackson and others throughout history.
  • 🎭 The interview had a 'dear leader' vibe, with Trump discussing his search for a vice president and international affairs.
  • 🌍 Trump complained about the U.S. funding for NATO, suggesting European nations should contribute more due to their economies and security risks.
  • 💭 Trump mentioned his personal struggles, like getting out of bed, in a humorous and exaggerated manner.
  • 🔍 Greg Kelly asked Trump about his numerous criminal investigations, to which Trump felt protected and possibly 'chosen'.
  • 📄 The discussion touched on Trump's classified documents case, with his lawyers arguing the Presidential Records Act doesn't apply to him.
  • 🐑 A Montana rancher bred giant clone sheep illegally for sport hunting purposes.
  • 🌾 The rancher, Arthur Jack Shoar, used biological tissue from threatened species in his breeding, leading to legal consequences.

Q & A

  • Who is the host of the show mentioned in the transcript?

    -The host of the show is Steven Colar.

  • What significant mathematical constant is celebrated on March 14th?

    -Pi (π) is celebrated on March 14th, as 3.14 are the first three digits of the constant.

  • What did Trump accomplish in the week mentioned in the transcript?

    -Trump clinched the Republican nomination for the 2024 election.

  • Who is Greg Kelly in the context of the transcript?

    -Greg Kelly is a Newsmax host with whom Trump had an interview.

  • What did Trump discuss extensively during his interview with Greg Kelly?

    -Trump discussed how unfairly he has been treated, his search for a vice president, and his views on NATO funding.

  • What is the significance of the phrase 'a thing called' used repeatedly by Trump in the transcript?

    -The phrase 'a thing called' is used by Trump as a verbal tick, emphasizing the topics he is discussing, such as the Civil War, ratings, and Truth Social.

  • How did Trump describe his morning routine during the interview?

    -Trump described his morning routine as a war, involving rolling over, sitting up, and putting on pants, which he referred to as the Battle of the Bulge.

  • What was the main point of discussion regarding Trump's classified documents case?

    -The main point was that Trump's lawyers argued the Presidential Records Act does not apply to him because he had the authority to designate presidential records as personal, thus they are not subject to the National Archives' jurisdiction.

  • What happened to Don Lemon after he was fired from CNN?

    -After being fired from CNN, Don Lemon announced a new show on Twitter, with his first guest being Elon Musk.

  • What was the outcome of Don Lemon's interview with Elon Musk?

    -The interview did not go well, leading to Elon Musk canceling the partnership with Don Lemon.

  • What illegal activity was Arthur Jack Shoar, the Montana Rancher, involved in?

    -Arthur Jack Shoar was involved in wildlife trafficking, specifically breeding giant sheep hybrids, which is illegal.

Outlines

00:00

🎤 The Late Show Monologue: Trump's Election and Pi Day

The host, Steven Colar, opens the show with a welcome and a humorous reference to Pi Day, which falls on March 14th. He then discusses the 2024 election, noting that Trump has secured the Republican nomination. The monologue continues with a satirical take on Trump's interview with Greg Kelly on Newsmax, where Trump complains about perceived unfair treatment and his style of speech. The host pokes fun at Trump's claims and references to the 'Deep State', his search for a vice president, and his comments on NATO and European nations. The segment ends with a joke about Trump's personal struggles and a mention of his criminal investigations, with a humorous take on the idea of Trump being 'the chosen one'.

05:02

🚗 Trump's Legal Troubles and Don Lemon's New Venture

The segment begins with a discussion of Trump's legal issues, focusing on his handling of classified documents and the defense presented by his lawyers. The host humorously compares Trump's situation to a car theft scenario, where Trump argues he couldn't have stolen the car because it was his. The summary then shifts to news about Don Lemon, a former CNN anchor, who was fired and has since started a new show on Twitter. The show's first guest was Elon Musk, but the partnership was reportedly canceled after the interview. The segment also touches on Lemon's questioning of Musk about his recent meeting with Trump and ends with a bizarre story about a Montana rancher breeding giant cloned sheep, which is illegal, and the rancher's upcoming sentencing.

10:03

🎶 Upcoming Show and Final Thoughts

The host wraps up the monologue by teasing the upcoming show, which will feature guest Paul Sun. He invites the audience to stay tuned for more entertainment and concludes the segment with a reference to the next episode of Law and Order: SVU, which will cover the details of the sheep breeding case discussed earlier. The segment ends with a musical cue and applause from the audience.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Pi Day

Pi Day is a celebration of the mathematical constant π (Pi), observed on March 14th each year. This date is chosen because it approximates the value of Pi (3.14159). In the context of the video, Pi Day is mentioned as a light-hearted way to start the show, highlighting the date and its significance to mathematics enthusiasts.

💡Irrational Number

An irrational number is a real number that cannot be expressed as a ratio of two integers, meaning it cannot be written as a simple fraction. Pi (π) is an example of an irrational number because it is an infinite, non-repeating decimal. In the video, the host humorously refers to Pi as the 'official irrational number of the 2024 election', drawing a parallel between the unpredictable nature of irrational numbers and the unpredictable nature of politics.

💡Trump

Donald Trump is an American politician and businessman who served as the 45th President of the United States from 2017 to 2021. In the context of the video, Trump is mentioned in relation to his activities and statements, particularly his interview on Newsmax and his reactions to various political and personal issues.

💡Deep State

The term 'Deep State' refers to the idea of a group of unelected government officials, bureaucrats, and intelligence officers who are believed to be influencing government policy and decisions behind the scenes, often against the interests of the elected government. In the video, the host uses the term in a satirical manner to comment on Trump's claims of a conspiracy against him.

💡MAGA

MAGA stands for 'Make America Great Again', a slogan popularized by Donald Trump during his 2016 presidential campaign. It encapsulates a political movement that seeks to restore a perceived past greatness to the United States, often associated with conservative and nationalist policies. In the video, the host uses 'MAGA' to humorously suggest that Trump's political agenda is focused on a return to a past ideal, with a twist on the phrase to 'Make America Gaspacho', a play on words referencing the 2024 election.

💡NATO

The North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO) is an intergovernmental military alliance between North American and European countries established in 1949. Its purpose is to provide collective defense, where an attack on one member is considered an attack on all. In the video, Trump complains about the United States footing the bill for NATO, suggesting that European nations should contribute more due to their economic size and perceived security risks.

💡Civil Investigations

Civil investigations refer to the process of examining and gathering evidence in a legal context, often related to disputes between private parties or regulatory matters. In the video, it is mentioned that Trump is facing multiple criminal investigations, which are described as attempts to destroy him, highlighting the legal challenges he is dealing with.

💡Classified Documents

Classified documents are materials that have been determined to potentially harm national security if disclosed without proper authorization. They are marked and handled with strict protocols to protect sensitive information. In the context of the video, Trump's handling of classified documents is discussed, with his lawyers arguing that as a former president, he had the authority to designate records as personal, thus not subject to the same regulations as official presidential records.

💡Twitter

Twitter is a social media platform known for its short, user-generated messages called 'tweets'. It has become a significant tool for communication, news dissemination, and political discourse. In the video, Twitter is mentioned in the context of Don Lemon, a former CNN anchor, who was fired and later started a new show on Twitter, with Elon Musk as his first guest.

💡Elon Musk

Elon Musk is an entrepreneur and business magnate known for founding SpaceX, Tesla, Inc., and Neuralink, among others. He is also the CEO and lead designer at SpaceX and became the owner of Twitter in 2022. In the video, Musk is mentioned in relation to his recent meeting with Trump and his appearance on Don Lemon's new show on Twitter.

💡Giant Sheep Hybrids

Giant Sheep Hybrids refer to the result of breeding different species of sheep to create a larger, hybrid animal. In the video, an 80-year-old rancher named Arthur Jack Shoar is mentioned for illegally breeding such hybrids for sport hunting purposes, which is a controversial practice due to ethical and legal concerns.

Highlights

The Late Show host Steven Colar discusses the 2024 election and Trump's official irrational number association.

Trump secured the Republican nomination and his interview with Greg Kelly on Newsmax.

Trump's complaints about unfair treatment and comparisons to Michael Jackson's 'Bad'.

The humorous take on Trump's eating habits and sleep routine.

Trump's discussion on his search for a vice president and political ambitions.

The satirical soup recipe for healing America's partisan divide.

Trump's comments on NATO and European nations' financial contributions.

The verbal tick Trump has been using, emphasizing the phrase 'a thing called'.

The humorous speculation on Trump's personal struggles and morning routine.

Greg Kelly's question about Trump's perception of being protected by divine intervention.

The discussion on Trump's classification of documents as personal and the legal implications.

Comparison of Trump's document case with Biden's, and Trump's defense.

The mention of Bill Clinton's 'socks case' and the infamous 'I did not have sexual relations' statement.

Update on Don Lemon's new show on Twitter and his interview with Elon Musk.

Elon Musk's cancellation of the partnership with Don Lemon and the Twitter community's reaction.

The revelation of Trump and Musk's meeting in Florida and their discussion.

Breaking news about the Montana Rancher breeding giant clone Franken sheep illegally.

Details on Arthur Jack Shoar's illegal sheep breeding and the use of threatened species' tissue.

The humorous conclusion of the sheep breeding saga and the upcoming sentencing.

Transcripts

00:00

welcome ladies and gentlemen to The Late

00:01

Show I'm your host Steven colar it is

00:07

March it is March 14th happy Pi

00:11

Day Pi of course uh goes on infinitely

00:15

which is why it has been named the

00:16

official irrational number of the 2024

00:20

election Trump uh clinched the

00:23

Republican nomination this week and last

00:25

night he went on Newsmax to talk to Greg

00:29

Kelly now if you don't know who Greg

00:30

Kelly is it doesn't

00:33

matter Trump spent a lot of the

00:35

interview talking about how unfairly

00:37

he's treated and I looked now even last

00:40

night I was saying it I said there's no

00:42

I don't care Andrew Jackson or anybody

00:44

else nobody has when you think of the

00:47

the fake things nobody's been treated

00:49

like Trump in terms of badly

00:54

totally totally normal way to say that

00:58

reminds of my favorite Michael Jackson

00:59

album

01:00

in terms of

01:03

badly does he talk like that the rest of

01:05

the day no one eats chicken nuggets like

01:07

Trump in terms of hungrily nobody puts

01:11

on pajamas like Trump by way of sleepily

01:14

and the Deep State the Deep state is for

01:16

forcing Trump to get up several times a

01:18

night appr propo of

01:21

poopy

01:23

or

01:26

aoop Trump talked about his his search

01:29

uh for a vice president president and

01:30

insisted that everybody wants the gig

01:33

there's not a person in politics that

01:35

doesn't want it and that includes

01:36

Democrats if I wanted I'd have a

01:37

Democrat I'd have a liberal I'd have a

01:40

uh I'd have anybody I want then do it

01:44

coward Trump Bernie

01:47

2024 do

01:49

it there is no look no quiet there is

01:54

only one way to heal America's partisan

01:56

divide that is

01:58

soup I've gone full Maga make America

02:01

gaspacho

02:02

again maybe a couple of

02:05

croutons then it was time for

02:07

international Affairs Trump complained

02:08

yet again about America footing the bill

02:10

for NATO the European nations as a

02:13

combination they should be paying the

02:14

same because you know their econom is

02:16

approximately the same size plus they're

02:18

in a lot more danger than we are we have

02:21

a thing called an ocean between us right

02:24

and uh they don't what kind of weirdo

02:27

says a thing called ocean a guy named

02:32

me there you go this is there you go and

02:36

that was worth it you got to go back and

02:39

get that

02:43

one uh this is actually a verbal tick

02:46

that Trump's been leaning on a lot

02:47

lately listen to this a thing called the

02:49

Civil War thing called ratings a thing

02:52

called Truth social a thing called super

02:54

Tuesday a thing called gasoline a thing

02:57

called

02:58

fish

03:02

seems weird but there's probably a very

03:03

simple explanation for why he talks that

03:05

way a thing called brain

03:09

damage Trump

03:13

[Music]

03:16

also Trump also opened about he opened

03:18

up about his personal struggles some

03:20

people say sir how do you get out of bed

03:23

in the morning it's a

03:26

war no it's true getting out of bed is a

03:28

war first fight is rolling over then

03:31

comes sitting up it's absolutely

03:33

harrowing and finally the

03:36

pants that's the real Battle of the

03:40

Bulge the whole interview had a real

03:42

sort of uh dear leader state run TV

03:45

Vibes here's an actual question that

03:47

Greg Kelly asked Trump about his many

03:49

criminal investigations these cases were

03:52

designed to destroy you yes and they've

03:54

helped you and some of us actually we

03:57

see I know my audience and me too we see

04:00

that you're protected maybe even by the

04:02

hand of God has that ever crossed your

04:04

mind quick followup is it true that you

04:06

are the chosen one the the quits kharak

04:10

who can bring balance to the force

04:11

defeat Voldemort free us from the Matrix

04:13

and then feed a hungry World by letting

04:15

us all suckle on your Bountiful blessed

04:19

teeths my Lord may I motorboat

04:27

you really did we

04:30

did we find the

04:33

line

04:34

no

04:37

no too

04:39

much the interview also touched on

04:41

Trump's classified documents case and

04:43

naturally Trump insisted that he did

04:45

nothing wrong there's something going on

04:47

because they're going after me viciously

04:49

then all of a sudden it comes out that

04:50

Biden took 10 times the number of

04:52

documents that I did and I took him very

04:55

legally

04:57

okay saying something you did something

05:00

very legally really makes it sound like

05:02

you broke the law look I went for a

05:04

drive very legally very soberly and I

05:08

drove into extremely no living rooms and

05:11

as a result a tremendous amount of my

05:13

wife is very not divorcing

05:16

me in defending himself Trump insisted

05:18

that he did nothing wrong but even if he

05:20

did it's okay because the clintons did

05:22

it first by the way they released

05:24

Hillary Clinton she hammered her phones

05:26

nothing happens to Bill Clinton he took

05:28

it out in his socks you know was famous

05:30

socks case oh we all remember Bill

05:31

Clinton's socks case who could forget

05:34

this famous line I did not have sexual

05:38

relations with that

05:40

woman I missed that takes you back

05:43

doesn't it that takes you

05:48

back today Donald Trump was in a Florida

05:51

Court uh for that case prided over by

05:53

Trump appointed federal

05:56

judge and picture in a cursed locket

05:58

that will steal your soul e Cannon his

06:01

lawyers argued today that the

06:03

presidential records act does not apply

06:05

to former president Trump because he had

06:07

virtually unreviewable authority to

06:10

designate presidential records as

06:12

personal ones and the National Archives

06:14

has authority over only presidential

06:16

records not personal ones okay so he has

06:19

the power to declare presidential

06:21

records personal records and as a result

06:24

they are no longer presidential records

06:26

because as president they belong to him

06:28

personally as you can see officer I

06:30

couldn't have stolen the car because I

06:33

have

06:35

it how could I steal something that's

06:37

already mine now do you have the keys

06:39

cuz I'm having a hell of a time Hotwire

06:41

in this some

06:43

oh uh in uh in in news news

06:46

there's new news about former CNN anchor

06:49

and Airbnb host who keeps hanging around

06:51

long after you get

06:54

there Don Lemon lemon if you'll remember

06:57

was fired from CNN uh last year but it

06:59

seems like he landed on his feet when he

07:01

announced in January that he was getting

07:02

a new show on Twitter and his first

07:05

guest was none other than Twitter owner

07:07

and Uber driver who's going to ask you

07:09

if you live alone Elon

07:11

Musk lemon interviewed musk uh just last

07:14

Friday right and evidently it did not go

07:17

uh too good because shortly after he

07:20

announced Elon Musk has canceled the

07:22

partnership I had with X you know

07:24

something went wrong when you're asked

07:25

to leave

07:27

Twitter I'm sorry but you're no longer

07:29

welcome in our community of Flat Earth

07:31

incel

07:32

Nazis lemon also pressed musk about his

07:35

recent meeting with Trump you recently

07:38

met with Donald Trump in Florida what

07:40

did you guys talk about I was at of

07:42

breakfast at a friend's place and Donald

07:44

Trump came by that's it what' you

07:47

discuss

07:50

I um let's just say uh he did most of

07:53

the

07:55

talking okay that checks

07:57

out Elon other guy I see you're enjoying

08:01

a thing called breakfast anyway can I

08:03

have a thing called $450

08:05

million and the rest of those pancakes

08:08

please what what what's that I'm getting

08:11

some urgent breaking sheep news is this

08:13

true yes a Montana Rancher bred giant

08:17

clone Franken

08:19

sheep that is awful and not only because

08:22

the most annoying guy you know just said

08:24

actually it's Franken sheep's

08:28

monster

08:31

the Mad Montana mutant mutton maker in

08:34

question is an 80-year-old Rancher named

08:36

Arthur Jack shoar so why did Ry Jack

08:40

make these Monsters the goal was hunting

08:43

them for

08:44

sport a yes there is no greater thrill

08:47

than hunting man's deadliest Predator

08:50

sheep good luck evading their natural

08:53

defense standing still and growing you a

08:57

sweater turns out all of this this uh

09:00

hybriding of the sheep it's all very

09:02

illegal which is why artjack pleaded

09:04

guilty to Wildlife trafficking after

09:07

nearly decade long conspiracy to breed

09:10

giant sheep hybrids and there is no way

09:12

to know how many illegal sheep he bred

09:15

because every time authorities tried to

09:16

count them they immediately fall

09:19

asleep the extra legal part of this the

09:22

extra legal part of this was hold on

09:24

hold on stay focused here the extra

09:26

legal part or extra illegal part of this

09:29

was using biological tissue obtained

09:32

from a threatened species the Marco Polo

09:35

argal sheep which is a great choice for

09:38

hunting because they always reveal their

09:42

location Marco

09:46

poo gotcha

09:55

apparently apparently and this is true

09:57

to make the hybrids he extracted Sean

10:00

from big horn sheep after paying $400 to

10:03

a hunting guide for the Sheep's

10:04

testicles oh yeah for that you got to

10:06

know a guy

10:09

hey you buying

10:11

balls I got sheep I got bull I got

10:14

humpback I got ostrich and listen if

10:16

you're into luxury items I got

10:21

Sasquatch last

10:27

pair good catch

10:30

but now the sheep nanigans have come to

10:32

an end shoar sentencing is set for July

10:36

and you can catch up on all the details

10:37

in the next episode of Law and Order

10:42

SVU we got a great show for you tonight

10:45

my

10:46

guest this Paul Sun you want we come

10:49

back meanwhile join us W

10:53

[Applause]

10:54

[Music]

10:58

you

10:59

[Music]

11:06

a