Darts Ultimate Showdown

Smosh Games
3 May 202456:11

Summary

TLDRThe video script presents a humorous and chaotic championship of darts, hosted by The Chosen, featuring a cast of eccentric characters. Gerald Cakes, a man of few words, shares his unfortunate parking lot incident. Daniel Terry, a dove-releasing small business owner, advertises his services and talks about living on a farm with his girlfriend. Fred Darts, a lifelong darts player, engages in playful banter with the other contestants. The game of 301 unfolds with unexpected turns, including a dead dove, trick shots, and discussions about releasing doves and pigeons at events. Amidst the friendly rivalry and laughter, Daniel Terry emerges victorious, seeking a new assistant and inviting everyone for meatloaf at his mom's place. The video ends with a call for audience suggestions for future competitions and participants.

Takeaways

  • 🏆 Daniel Terry emerges as the champion of darts in a humorous and competitive setting.
  • 🎯 The game of darts in the script is played in a light-hearted and entertaining manner, with a focus on camaraderie rather than just winning.
  • 💸 Daniel Terry mentions his small business of releasing doves at weddings and hints at a potential assistant position, offering a day rate of $250.
  • 🤣 The script is filled with humorous interactions and one-liners, showcasing the personalities of the characters involved.
  • 🐦鸽子(doves) play a recurring theme in the script, with Daniel Terry often referring to them and even using them as a form of currency or reward.
  • 🎉 The prospect of a meatloaf dinner serves as a motivating prize for the darts competition.
  • 😎 Gerald Cakes is portrayed as a mysterious and somewhat enigmatic character, with a focus on his physical stature and his quiet demeanor.
  • 🎰 The script includes various cultural references and jokes, such as mentions of Limp Bizkit, Ethan Hunt, and WWE, adding to the playful atmosphere.
  • 👎 The character Fred Darts (a play on the name of the musician Fred Durst) is depicted as having poor performance in the game, often scoring zero points.
  • 🤦‍♂️ The Chosen, despite his nickname, seems to struggle throughout the game, experiencing several humorous failures and frustrations.
  • 👀 The script hints at a potential rivalry or tension between Daniel Terry and The Chosen, with The Chosen being chosen as Daniel's assistant despite the competitive nature of their relationship.

Q & A

  • Who is the host of the darts championship?

    -The host of the darts championship is The Chosen.

  • What is Gerald Cakes' profession?

    -Gerald Cakes is a man of few words and does not explicitly state his profession in the script.

  • What does Daniel Terry do for a living?

    -Daniel Terry is a small business owner who releases doves at weddings.

  • What game are they playing in the championship?

    -They are playing 301 in the darts championship.

  • What does Fred Darts claim to have been doing since he was a kid?

    -Fred Darts claims to have been playing darts since he was a kid.

  • Why does Daniel Terry want to find an assistant?

    -Daniel Terry wants to find an assistant to help with handling and transporting the birds for his dove-releasing business.

  • What does Daniel Terry offer to do for people who contact him via Venmo?

    -Daniel Terry offers to release doves at events, specifically weddings, for people who contact him via Venmo.

  • What is the prize for winning the darts game?

    -The prize for winning the darts game is dinner, specifically meatloaf.

  • Why does Gerald Cakes keep mentioning his brother?

    -Gerald Cakes mentions his brother as a way to psych himself up and improve his focus during the game.

  • What is the significance of the doves in the script?

    -The doves are used as a humorous element and are part of Daniel Terry's business. They are also symbolically released at the end to celebrate the winner.

  • Why does The Chosen keep getting zero points?

    -The Chosen keeps getting zero points due to a combination of bad luck, lack of skill, and the competitive nature of the game.

Outlines

00:00

🎯 Darts Championship Introduction

The script opens with an introduction to a darts championship, where The Chosen welcomes the audience and introduces the players. Gerald Cakes, a man of few words, shares an awkward story about car accidents. Daniel Terry, a small business owner who releases doves at weddings, talks about his life on the farm with his girlfriend. Fred Darts, an experienced darts player since childhood, is also introduced. The participants discuss the game rules, and a ceremonial dove release is suggested before the game begins, though there's a concern about the dove's health.

05:05

👊 Competitive Darts and Personal Anecdotes

The darts game intensifies with players sharing their strategies and personal stories. Daniel talks about his business, while Fred discusses his long-term experience with darts. There's a mix of humor, friendly banter, and some tension as the game progresses. The players also discuss the mysterious invitation to the darts game, and there's a running joke about a dead bird. The competition continues with various scores and comments, revealing the characters' dynamics and competitive nature.

10:05

🍰 Gerald Cakes' Strategy and Humor

Gerald Cakes emerges as a potentially formidable player, despite some humorous banter about his size and the mysterious 'cakes of wrath.' The participants continue to play darts, with a focus on Gerald's strategy and the ongoing jokes about the doves. There's a sense of camaraderie and rivalry as they discuss their personal lives, their views on competition, and their hopes for the game's outcome.

15:06

🦆 The Doves' Role in the Game

The script highlights the role of doves in the game, with Daniel Terry's business being a central theme. There's a discussion about returning the doves to the farm after events, and a humorous moment where a player is dared to attempt a trick shot. The competitive spirit remains, with players encouraging each other and discussing their scores. The dialogue is interspersed with jokes, comments on the game's physics, and more references to the doves.

20:07

🎉 The Darts Championship Climax

As the game reaches its climax, the players discuss their strategies and hopes for victory. There's a focus on the prize of having dinner, specifically meatloaf, which Fred is particularly excited about. The competition heats up, with players landing various scores and engaging in more banter. The script ends with a sense of anticipation for the final results and a continuation of the humorous tone throughout.

25:07

🏆 Daniel Terry's Victory and Assistant Search

Daniel Terry is announced as the winner of the darts championship and humorously looks for a new assistant, seemingly considering The Chosen for the role. The closing segment includes a discussion about the game, the players' experiences, and an invitation for the audience to suggest future competitors or games. The script concludes on a light-hearted note with a call for Venmo payment for Daniel's services, maintaining the humorous and competitive atmosphere established throughout the video.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Darts

Darts is a competitive sport involving players throwing small, pointed missiles at a circular target from a distance. In the video, it is the central theme and activity, with characters engaging in a championship game of darts, aiming for high scores and showcasing various throws.

💡Championship

A championship is the highest level of competition in a particular sport or game, often signifying the most prestigious event where the winner is crowned. In the context of the video, it is a darts competition where the characters vie for the title of 'champion of darts'.

💡Small Business Owner

A small business owner is an individual who owns and operates a small-scale enterprise, often providing specialized goods or services. In the video, Daniel Terry is a small business owner who releases doves at weddings, which is a unique aspect of his character and profession.

💡Venmo

Venmo is a digital wallet payment service that allows users to make mobile payments and money transfers. In the script, Daniel Terry mentions Venmo as a method of payment for his dove-releasing services, highlighting the use of modern technology in transactions.

💡Peace Doves

Peace doves are symbolic birds often released at significant events, such as weddings or peace ceremonies, to symbolize peace, love, and harmony. In the video, doves are used as a recurring motif, with Daniel Terry's business involving their release at weddings, and they are also used to start the darts game in a spirit of peace.

💡Dartboard

A dartboard is a circular target board used in the game of darts, typically made of sisal fibers, with numbered sections that players aim to hit with thrown darts. The dartboard is central to the video's action, as it is the target for the characters' darts throws.

💡Trick Shots

Trick shots in the context of darts are unconventional or particularly difficult throws that are meant to impress or are executed as a form of showmanship. In the video, characters attempt trick shots to demonstrate their skill or to add an element of entertainment to the game.

💡Meatloaf

Meatloaf is a dish made from ground meat, usually beef, that is formed into a loaf shape and then baked. It is mentioned in the video as a prize for the winner of the darts game, adding a humorous and casual element to the competition.

💡Bust

In the game of darts, to 'bust' means to exceed the number of points needed to win a leg, causing the player to score nothing for that turn. The concept of 'busting' is mentioned in the script when a player fails to finish the game on a specific score, resulting in a loss of points for that round.

💡Taxidermy

Taxidermy is the art of preserving dead animals, typically by mounting them with lifelike poses. In the video, there is a humorous reference to taxidermied birds, which are actually live doves used by Daniel Terry for his business, adding a layer of absurdity to the character's actions.

💡Comment Section

The comment section is an area on digital platforms, such as blogs or videos, where users can post their feedback or engage in discussion. In the script, a character asks viewers to post their questions in the comments below, which is a common interactive feature on video-sharing platforms.

Highlights

The Chosen introduces the championship of darts, an ancient game of precision and honor.

Gerald Cakes, a man of few words, humorously recounts his unfortunate parking lot incident.

Daniel Terry, a small business owner specializing in dove releases at weddings, introduces himself and his peaceful lifestyle.

A dramatic moment unfolds when a dove's status is questioned, leading to a discussion on peace and the game's commencement.

Fred Darts, a lifelong darts player, showcases his skills and provides a commentary on the game's strategy.

The Chosen's attempt at a trick shot with a dart ends in a surprising and humorous outcome.

Daniel Terry's business of releasing doves is discussed, including the logistics and the income it generates.

A bizarre exchange occurs about hawks and personal safety in the context of the darts game.

Gerald Cakes is suspected of being a robot due to his mysterious nature and performance in the game.

The Chosen and Gerald Cakes engage in a heated rivalry, with The Chosen taunting Gerald with psychological tactics.

Daniel Terry expresses his desire for a large family, specifically wanting at least six children.

A dramatic turn takes place when a player appears to have won, only to find out they've 'busted' and lost points.

The Chosen's high-energy character is highlighted, contrasting with the more subdued gameplay of others.

Daniel Terry's victory in the darts championship leads to a humorous job offer for The Chosen as his assistant.

The closing segment invites audience suggestions for future competitors and games, encouraging interaction and engagement.

Transcripts

00:00

- The ancient game of darts.

00:03

A game of precision and honor.

00:06

I am The Chosen and welcome

00:09

to today's championship of darts.

00:12

Let us meet our other warriors.

00:15

- I'm Gerald Cakes.

00:17

Do not get confused.

00:20

I am a man of few words.

00:23

I rear-ended someone in the parking lot,

00:25

and then I got into my car and crashed into someone.

00:28

(light music)

00:33

And now, where do I go?

00:35

- Hey, guys.

00:43

Woo! That was a close one.

00:44

She almost got away.

00:46

And I just spit.

00:47

Hey, guys, I'm Daniel Terry, small business owner.

00:52

I release doves at weddings.

00:54

My mom owns a beautiful farm,

00:55

and me and my girlfriend currently live there.

00:58

And we are very happy.

01:00

And if you want me, you can Venmo me

01:02

and I release the doves

01:04

and they're always on time and always ready to go.

01:07

Okay, so find me. Daniel.

01:10

(beep)

01:12

(beep)

01:13

- Was that Ace Ventura or what?

01:14

(Shayne laughing)

01:16

- [Courtney] I'm sorry.

01:17

- Fred Darts here.

01:19

You know, I've been playing darts since I was a kid.

01:23

- Jesus Christ.

01:24

- If you have any questions,

01:25

put them in the comments below.

01:26

Let's go. Let's do this.

01:27

We're playing 301.

01:29

- No way. No way.

01:31

- That's, yeah, okay.

01:33

- Yeah, whatever.

01:35

- Who wishes to begin? - Wait.

01:37

Before we begin, release the dove.

01:40

- Yo, I think it's dead.

01:44

- Don't say that, man.

01:45

It's not. She's good. She's solid.

01:48

All right. - You put a dead bird

01:49

back in your pocket.

01:51

- Hey, she's not dead, man.

01:53

- Yo, that's neither here nor there.

01:55

- Listen, (beep)

01:56

a wing from a dove is peace.

02:00

Let's start this game in peace.

02:01

Here we go.

02:02

- Do you wish me to begin, or do you wish to begin?

02:04

- Yeah, let's see what you got, little man.

02:06

- Little. Okay, fine.

02:09

- Whoa.

02:11

- [Amanda] Wow.

02:13

- You're a troublesome lad.

02:15

- I didn't know this was gonna be a dangerous game.

02:17

- This is how darts goes.

02:19

All right, I will begin.

02:20

- [Amanda] All right. - Show you how it's done.

02:23

- Yeah.

02:25

- Band of fools.

02:27

Watch this.

02:28

Stop touching my sword.

02:31

That's my sacred weapon.

02:34

Okay, check this out.

02:35

- Has anyone ever touched your sword before?

02:37

- No.

02:38

- Okay, I see.

02:39

- Unlike Fred Darts here,

02:41

I refuse the nookie.

02:43

- [Amanda] Oh.

02:44

- Shit. Okay. - Well, that's what happens.

02:47

- Just warming up. Relax.

02:48

- It's just one of those days.

02:51

- Okay. All right, it's still warming up.

02:55

Here we go.

02:58

All right. - Oh!

03:00

- Wormed its way down there.

03:01

17.

03:03

Not so good, but

03:06

just you watch, I'll catch up.

03:08

- I'm on my way.

03:11

(Spencer laughing)

03:13

- I'm feeling a lot better now.

03:16

- I'm on my way.

03:17

(rock music)

03:20

- Oh, nice.

03:22

Two points.

03:24

(Shayne laughing)

03:26

- I'm on my way.

03:29

- Nice. - Nice. Well done.

03:31

- With magnets, the key is to arc it.

03:34

- I'm looking for an assistant.

03:37

All right. - Well, good luck

03:38

on your search. - Thanks.

03:40

I'll Facebook Market that place.

03:42

- That's not, what?

03:44

- Fred, can you hold my bird?

03:46

- Yeah, I don't really do that.

03:48

- Just be careful. - I got her.

03:49

- All right. - I have her.

03:50

- Thanks, man.

03:51

Seriously, position is open.

03:54

250 for 12 hours.

03:56

It's pretty excellent.

03:57

$250. That's to be clear.

03:59

- Where are you getting that kind of money?

04:01

- [Spencer] $3 bill. - I release doves at weddings.

04:03

- How much did you get paid for that?

04:05

- $250 for 12 hours.

04:06

You have to be there the whole day and the night before.

04:09

All right, here we go.

04:10

Let's start this up.

04:14

Bitch. - [Chosen] Okay.

04:15

- So that's 20.

04:18

- Oh wow. - Zero.

04:21

- [Chosen] Well, a little too much power there.

04:22

- No worries. Yeah, it's a lot of power.

04:25

- Enough power to kill a bird in your hand.

04:27

- The bird is fine.

04:29

Everything's fine, man.

04:30

Okay, I have to return it to my mom's farm, so stop.

04:33

20.

04:35

- He forgot about me.

04:37

- You haven't gone yet? - No.

04:39

- All right, go.

04:40

(dramatic music)

04:42

- [Amanda] Let's see behind those blue eyes, man.

04:44

(dramatic music)

04:48

- Well, he's not a force user.

04:49

- Woo! Yeah. All right.

04:52

- Suddenly, I forgot all Limp Bizkit song names.

04:56

(everyone laughing)

04:58

(rock music)

05:04

(Fred groaning)

05:06

- Oh.

05:08

Oh my God.

05:10

He's a groaner.

05:14

- Uh. - Well, he's not

05:15

(Amanda laughing)

05:16

He's absolutely not chosen, that's for sure.

05:19

- Why would I wanna be like you, little man?

05:22

No bitches.

05:23

(rock music)

05:24

(groans) Man.

05:27

It's just one of those days.

05:28

(people offscreen laughing)

05:29

- Go collect your darts, dumbass.

05:30

- Go collect your bullshit.

05:32

- Zero.

05:34

- That sucks.

05:36

- No one knows what it's like.

05:37

- This is gonna take forever unless I solve it.

05:39

So here we go.

05:40

(light music)

05:45

- Excellent.

05:47

- [Chosen] Damn it. - He's been practicing

05:49

semen retention. - Even that is too far.

05:52

Let's see. Nine.

05:55

And that's a 36.

05:58

- I can't look away. - Or no, wait, 24. 33.

06:01

- You guys should have a cake off.

06:02

- The age I will become a man.

06:04

- I bet I could bounce a door off that thing.

06:08

- What?

06:09

Jesus Christ, man.

06:11

- Don't you know I pack a chainsaw?

06:13

- Who was the person that sent the anonymous letter

06:15

to tell us to play darts?

06:16

Was that you or?

06:18

- Nobody knows.

06:19

- I think his name was Mr. Body.

06:21

- Actually, it was a Partiful invite,

06:23

so I'm not really sure who sent it out.

06:25

- Oh, I don't have a phone. I just have a big computer.

06:29

Oh, sorry, sir. - Sorry.

06:32

Sorry.

06:34

Oh, Jesus Christ. - [Amanda] Oof.

06:36

- I feel confronted by it.

06:38

- I'm on my way.

06:39

- [Chosen] That's what caused the eclipse.

06:42

- Yo, we should give him something for that.

06:45

- I'm on my way.

06:46

- [Chosen] Give him something for that?

06:48

- Oh. - Oh.

06:49

- So when you swing it up, it kinda will swing down usually.

06:53

- Yes, that is how physics works.

06:55

- I'm a small business owner,

06:56

so I really had to work these kinks out, you know?

06:59

- From throwing all those dead birds in the air.

07:01

- [Daniel] They're alive, man.

07:02

- Oh.

07:05

- [Daniel] 15.

07:08

Wow.

07:09

- That's, that's, yep.

07:15

- Here you go. Here you go. Here you go.

07:16

Can you hang onto that for me?

07:18

Okay.

07:21

My mom said that she'd cooked dinner for us all after this.

07:25

- Sick.

07:26

I hope she's got worms.

07:28

(people offscreen laughing)

07:30

To eat.

07:33

It's a reference.

07:34

- Oh. - God.

07:36

- Well, she doesn't have worms,

07:37

but our dog, Teddy, had worms and that was tragic.

07:41

All right, here we go. - It's just one

07:41

of those days.

07:42

- Here we go.

07:46

- All right, pretty good.

07:48

Oh, Jesus. Lot of power.

07:51

Okay.

07:52

Not so bad, Daniel. - 46.

07:55

- Feel like a freight train.

07:58

(Shayne laughing)

08:00

First one to complain.

08:03

- You're getting further away.

08:04

- [Daniel] You're actually not doing well. Just heads up.

08:06

- Oh, that is, you're at zero still.

08:10

- It's just one of those days.

08:11

- [Chosen] Should've never taken the wheels

08:13

out of your Heelys.

08:14

- Yeah, what kind of shoes are those?

08:16

- I got them at PacSun.

08:21

Nice. - You're over the line.

08:24

- [Fred] Get his ass.

08:25

(dramatic music)

08:28

- Oh, come on.

08:30

If this was a real dartboard, I would've won by now.

08:31

I think that's 13 plus 17.

08:36

30.

08:37

- Well done. Release the doves.

08:39

- Jesus. We're all gonna catch bird flu.

08:43

- Why do you guys keep saying stuff like that?

08:45

These are my mom's precious birds. Everything's fine.

08:48

All right, go get them.

08:50

- [Chosen] You've got this, Mr. Cakes.

08:53

The cakes of wrath.

08:54

(dramatic music)

08:58

- Nice. - Oh.

08:59

- I'm on my way.

09:02

- Uh-oh.

09:04

Uh-oh.

09:06

- [Chosen] Welp.

09:08

- I think we've all been there.

09:09

- Woo!

09:10

So you know, I also attend funerals

09:13

and I release pigeons. (Gerald crying)

09:19

Hold my bird.

09:22

Peace.

09:24

(beep)

09:27

(beep) - [Chosen] Throw with a

09:28

certain amount of rage.

09:30

(beep)

09:33

- [Gerald] It's deep within. - The peace feathers just,

09:35

they really messed me up, man.

09:37

It's pretty crazy.

09:38

- The what? - The feathers of peace.

09:41

- [Fred] Oh.

09:41

- Oh, that's Sandy.

09:44

- The feathers fell out onto the ground.

09:46

- Well, I guess I'll pass them on to you guys.

09:48

Come on, Sandy, let's go.

09:49

- Here you go.

09:50

(rock music)

09:52

- [Daniel] All right.

09:55

- [Chosen] Look. - [Daniel] Get them, Fred.

09:56

- We rented out this American Legion

09:58

for the next couple hours, okay?

10:00

So just really- - That was crazy.

10:02

- [Chosen] Make use of it.

10:05

- Still gotta figure out who sent us that letter

10:06

to tell us to play darts all together.

10:08

(rock music)

10:09

- [Chosen] The Illuminati.

10:12

Okay. Oh. - That was pathetic.

10:16

- So Fred, have you gotten zero points so far?

10:18

- It would appear so. - Bummer.

10:20

- That's really, really rough, man.

10:22

- Because the winner gets to go have dinner.

10:25

Meatloaf.

10:26

(Fred gasping)

10:28

(people offscreen laughing)

10:31

- Did somebody say meatloaf?

10:33

(rock music)

10:34

- It's too bad that doesn't count.

10:37

You straight up just actually threw a bullseye.

10:42

- It's just one of those days.

10:44

- You are totally gonna get meatloaf if you win.

10:47

- It's pretty crazy that Spencer

10:48

is the high energy character of this video.

10:51

- Easy.

10:53

Shit.

10:55

That one's gonna fall over now.

10:56

- That's a 16.

10:59

- Okay. - Oh.

11:02

- Whatever.

11:03

I'll take it. 45 points.

11:05

- How about less than that?

11:05

- How did you get zero and then they got a bullseye.

11:07

- How about?

11:08

- Meatloaf. - Put your hand out.

11:10

- No.

11:12

- It's a bit straighter.

11:15

Whoa!

11:17

- I'm on my way. - [Chosen] Pretty good.

11:18

(dramatic music)

11:21

- Wow. - [Chosen] Nice.

11:23

- [Daniel] That was excellent. - [Chosen] Okay.

11:25

- Whoa. - Jesus Christ.

11:26

- Every time I see that butt,

11:27

something inside of me says, "I gotta sit down."

11:30

You know what I'm saying?

11:32

- 20.

11:33

- Can you hold?

11:35

- What is this? - [Daniel] Be proud.

11:36

(people offscreen laughing)

11:38

- I don't know.

11:39

- It's a massive dove from Australia.

11:41

It's protected.

11:42

- Just play into his fantasies.

11:44

- It's protected. They're not fantasies, man.

11:47

I have a job to do.

11:48

- 'Cause you gotta have faith.

11:51

- Every darts competition

11:52

has to have one "Caddy Shack" cosplayer.

11:57

Daniel Terry is ours.

12:00

- 48. - Christ.

12:02

It's a lot of power.

12:06

Impressive, Daniel Terry.

12:07

You seem to be taking flight.

12:10

- Ah, I see what you did there. And I liked it.

12:12

We're all getting Venmo-ed for this, right?

12:14

- What? We play for honor, not for money.

12:18

- Oh. - I'm broke.

12:21

- Yeah, I could've guessed.

12:24

- No. - Oh, I'm on the board.

12:25

- [Chosen] He's gaining power.

12:26

(dramatic music)

12:30

- Think of the nookie.

12:32

(dramatic music)

12:37

- Oh, the nookie did not serve you well.

12:42

- Okay.

12:43

(dramatic music)

12:46

- There you go. - [Fred] Five.

12:50

19. 24 points.

12:52

- All right, it's time to put this to bed.

12:54

- [Fred] Toga.

12:55

- Shit. Too much power.

12:57

- Daniel Terry.

12:59

(Spencer and Amanda gasping) - Damn it.

13:02

(everyone gasping)

13:03

- [Offscreen] Whoa.

13:04

- There it is. - I just got chills.

13:07

- [Fred] All right. - They're multiplying.

13:09

- [Chosen] Well, that's-

13:11

- Wait a second. That doesn't feel right.

13:14

- 75 points.

13:16

- Wow, I feel like I'm on an adventure. A journey.

13:18

So my girlfriend and I are going on two years.

13:23

- You have a girlfriend? - [Chosen] Nice.

13:24

- I do have a girlfriend.

13:25

We live on my mom's property in a one bedroom.

13:27

It's pretty epic.

13:29

- I'm on my way.

13:30

- [Daniel] All right.

13:33

- Would y'all ever think about having kids?

13:35

- Oh, absolutely. We definitely want kids.

13:37

Oh God. Okay.

13:39

We definitely want kids.

13:41

I want at least six.

13:44

- Have you thought about what your partner wants?

13:47

(people offscreen laughing)

13:49

- Yeah.

13:50

- Wow, Fred Darts, I wouldn't expect you

13:52

to be this considerate.

13:54

- [Daniel] Yeah, she wants at least six.

13:57

Of course, whatever she can manage.

13:59

- Sorry, Gerald Cakes. It appears you have failed.

14:03

- I'm surprised you caught on.

14:04

(Spencer laughing)

14:07

- I'm surprised you caught on, son.

14:09

- Quit yapping while I'm sporting.

14:11

- Sorry about that.

14:13

- It's killing my grind.

14:15

(Spencer laughing)

14:18

You be careful 'cause I'm on my way.

14:22

- To being my assistant?

14:24

- I don't think Gerald Cakes,

14:26

Jesus Christ.

14:27

- Can you hold Nina?

14:29

- Why are the eyes red? - They're like the juggernaut.

14:32

- Dove's eyes are always red.

14:34

There's peace, but there's a little war inside.

14:36

All right, here we go. - What?

14:38

- Leo Tolstoy said that.

14:41

(dramatic music)

14:43

(beep)

14:44

- Nice wall. - [Chosen] All right.

14:46

- I think I'm getting more Shaggy by the second.

14:49

- Getting more something.

14:50

(dramatic music)

14:52

- All right, well, you got on the board.

14:55

Ah, rough.

14:57

- Looks like I'm eating alone at my mom's.

15:00

- What happened to your partner?

15:02

- I don't know. I don't know who it is.

15:03

- She's definitely gonna break up with you after this.

15:06

- My mom?

15:07

- Your girlfriend.

15:08

- Mom's can never break up with their sons.

15:10

You should know that, Chosen.

15:12

- I don't know, I think that's

15:13

- Tell that to my broken family.

15:15

(everyone laughing) - Oh God.

15:19

(rock music)

15:22

- [Chosen] Not bad.

15:23

- Your best bet is to stay away, mother (beep).

15:26

(Amanda laughing)

15:28

- It was a clean throw, but it was just very off.

15:30

- Okay.

15:32

27.

15:33

- What's the score?

15:34

- [Offscreen 2] Gerald is at 258 points.

15:38

Fred, you're at 250 points.

15:41

Daniel, 187.

15:44

Chosen, 101.

15:45

- Hmm. - Oh, (beep). All right.

15:48

- Yeah.

15:49

Makes sense since I'm schooling you guys

15:51

on darts 101 right now. - I hate competition.

15:55

- It's time for another bullseye.

15:57

Shit. That would've been really fricking cool.

16:01

Ki-ya.

16:01

Shit.

16:03

I'm just (beep) around now

16:04

since I need to let you guys catch up.

16:05

- So then look at us while you throw the dart, man.

16:09

Yeah.

16:10

I don't think you're gonna be a good assistant.

16:13

- It's fine. I still got 17 points even without trying.

16:17

- Saying ki-ya is millennial coded.

16:20

- I've seen many millennia.

16:23

- You know what they say,

16:25

talk softly and carry a big stick.

16:28

Or in this case, a little dart.

16:31

I'm on my way.

16:33

- Gerald is so mysterious. Am I right?

16:35

- Well, he's quoting Teddy Roosevelt. It's not that crazy.

16:37

- Oh, Teddy Roosevelt.

16:40

The rockstar. - [Chosen] What?

16:42

(light music)

16:49

It's all right. - Magnets are tough.

16:51

- How do they work?

16:53

(people offscreen laughing)

16:54

Whoa. - Whoa!

16:57

- You got 97 points?

16:59

- I told you I'm on my way.

17:00

I told you I'm on my way.

17:01

I told you I'm on my way. (Shayne laughing)

17:03

I told you.

17:05

I told you.

17:06

- Yeah, I'm waiting for you

17:07

to come on, get over here on your way.

17:08

- I think Gerald Cakes might be a robot

17:10

that's glitching out now.

17:11

(Spencer laughing)

17:13

- I told him I'm on my way.

17:15

- [Daniel] I don't know, Gerald might be the only one

17:17

I can trust because I can't figure him out.

17:18

- When Gerald Cakes buys a plane ticket,

17:20

he has to book the entire economy class

17:24

to fit all that shit. - There you go.

17:25

- I bet you fly Virgin, little man.

17:28

(people offscreen laughing)

17:31

- That was awesome. All right, here we go.

17:39

(beep)

17:41

Yeah! So that's a six.

17:45

- I feel like these are a burden.

17:48

- Goddamn it. - That was awesome.

17:51

Thanks for handing it to me just, like, flat on the ground.

17:56

- Wow, this is the most embarrassing thing

17:58

I've ever witnessed in my life.

17:59

- Yo, consistency is key.

18:01

- Should I end this?

18:03

- Ew. - No, shut up.

18:04

- You're definitely not gonna be my partner

18:06

'cause you have too much of an ego.

18:08

And to be honest, birds don't like that.

18:10

They can sense that. It's fear.

18:12

That's what egos are. It's fear. That's what my mom says.

18:16

- Damn it. - [Gerald] Pathetic.

18:17

- Okay.

18:19

- Air ball.

18:20

- Oh (beep). - Air ball.

18:21

- [Fred] He may have us.

18:23

- Okay.

18:24

- All right, that's

18:27

28 plus 19

18:31

plus 19.

18:33

- There's still time.

18:35

- Yes, to be my partner.

18:39

Ooh.

18:40

- Betrayed by the magnetism.

18:43

- [Daniel] Not looking good.

18:44

- Perhaps it's the eclipse that caused that.

18:47

Welp. - Oopsie-

18:48

- The eclipse did not cause that.

18:50

- Daisy.

18:52

Gerald is kinda like cyclops.

18:53

If he takes off the sunglasses, we're all toast.

18:56

- [Chosen] I'd say he's more of a centaur, but yeah.

18:59

- That's a triple 17

19:01

if I dare say so myself.

19:03

Oh boy.

19:04

- [Spencer] 51?

19:06

- Impressive.

19:08

- [Fred] They're on their way.

19:09

- So what is a Limp Bizkit?

19:12

- Well.

19:13

- A Limp Bizkit is something my mom makes.

19:15

Her name is Nancy and she's very kind.

19:17

Right? - Yeah.

19:19

- A Limp Bizkit is a ancient art

19:22

that has thankfully been dead since 2005.

19:25

- [Gerald] What was that?

19:28

(beep) - I think I only know

19:29

the Urban Dictionary one. (beep)

19:33

- That's a triple.

19:35

36.

19:36

- All right, Fred Dunce.

19:38

- Oh my God!

19:39

- [Chosen] You just killed a bird.

19:40

- No! No!

19:42

- You just killed his dead bird.

19:45

- That wasn't me. - It's a lie.

19:46

- [Fred] That was not me.

19:47

- We need to acknowledge that there is a man

19:49

carrying around a bunch of taxidermied birds.

19:51

- They're alive and they're perfect for wedding ceremonies.

19:55

You release them after they say "I do",

19:58

and everyone has a special time.

20:01

And I need an assistant.

20:02

- Do you have to go track the birds down after?

20:04

- My mom has a farm.

20:06

- Do the birds go back to the farm?

20:08

- Of course. I return them always.

20:10

She lets me keep a couple.

20:12

- Shrimp Bizkit.

20:13

(everyone laughing)

20:15

- It did a flip. That's what's crazy.

20:17

- Limp Bizkit.

20:19

- That did not work. - Simp Bizkit.

20:22

(beep)

20:24

Mulligan?

20:27

- That's rough.

20:27

We go until someone gets down to zero.

20:29

- And right now it's looking like my man, Chosen.

20:34

- I dare you to eat shit right now.

20:37

- Hmm.

20:38

Since I definitely have at least one more round

20:40

before any of you could possibly catch me,

20:42

I'm willing to do some trick shots here.

20:45

- [Daniel] Okay. - I will throw

20:46

from all the way back here.

20:48

- Is that legal?

20:50

- Yeah. - Sure, I'll just stand

20:52

right behind you. - Okay.

20:54

Here we go.

20:55

(dramatic music)

21:00

Damn it.

21:02

Shit.

21:03

- You almost had the win, but you-

21:04

- No points, but that's fine. - Sacrificed it.

21:08

- That was cool though. I almost got it.

21:09

- So I should be able to shoot closer

21:13

is what you're saying.

21:14

Oh shit, my magnet.

21:16

- You literally are falling apart.

21:18

- What?

21:19

- [Offscreen] Is it broken?

21:20

- I'm the real alpha.

21:21

I told you to eat shit and you did.

21:25

- I didn't eat shit.

21:26

I attempted an incredible trick shot

21:29

and I nearly did it.

21:30

That's not eating shit.

21:31

You would know a thing or two about shit.

21:33

- Whoa.

21:34

You guys are fighting.

21:38

No one has secret conversations with me.

21:39

I wanna learn about shit

21:41

if that's necessary. - Daniel Terry,

21:43

you've been eating the most shit

21:44

out of everyone here somehow.

21:45

- Okay. - Despite the fact

21:47

that Fred Durst over here is worse than you.

21:49

- It's Fred Darts.

21:51

- [Chosen] Goddamn.

21:52

- Totally different guy.

21:53

- At least my shit is filled with birds.

21:56

- What? - What?

21:58

- So you're eating them?

22:00

- Stop doing this.

22:02

- I'm on my way.

22:05

- To fourth place.

22:07

(people offscreen laughing)

22:09

- I'm on my way.

22:12

- Actually, Cakes is ahead of me, which is insane.

22:16

- It's not that insane.

22:18

You wanna know about insane?

22:21

- [Chosen] This is getting intense in here.

22:24

- Thanks for having my back.

22:27

- It keeps getting- - Shit, no problem.

22:28

- Keeps getting more and more humid.

22:29

I don't know why. (Spencer laughing)

22:31

- Does this little domino area get anything?

22:34

- I think those are for dart storage.

22:35

- It's a legend.

22:38

- The legend of what?

22:39

- No, it's like a legend. Like on a map.

22:43

(people offscreen laughing)

22:44

- All right.

22:46

Here we go. Daniel Terry for the win.

22:48

- Ah!

22:50

Okay, actually impressive.

22:51

- [Fred] Yeah.

22:55

- Did you also throw your dart?

22:56

- No.

22:59

- That was against - [Daniel] Fred.

23:02

- Oh, close.

23:04

- That could've been anyone's dart over there.

23:08

- [Daniel] 15. - Well, it's

23:09

specifically red, so.

23:10

- Plus eight plus nine.

23:13

- No, one fell on the floor.

23:14

- [Offscreen] 32.

23:16

- That one's not mine, Fred.

23:19

Listen, Fred, you're in the running to becoming my partner

23:21

so don't (beep) it up, okay?

23:26

Whoa.

23:27

- [Chosen] There you go. 10 or 18.

23:29

- Nothing.

23:32

- That felt louder than all the other impacts on the wall.

23:35

- Here we go.

23:36

(dramatic music)

23:38

- Let's make things interesting. (laughs)

23:43

- Okay.

23:45

What?

23:46

- Let's make things interesting.

23:47

How about you walk out of that door right now?

23:51

- Woo!

23:53

- Really?

23:54

You're really believing what you're saying

23:55

right now, aren't you? (Spencer laughing)

23:59

- Don't say I didn't warn you.

24:02

- Just let your bird on the ground.

24:03

- Oh.

24:04

Well, I thought you guys were having a moment,

24:06

so I wanted to release the dove at the right time.

24:08

- God.

24:09

So Gerald, you got zero points on that one, right?

24:12

- Why would you bring it up?

24:14

- So I can once again do a bunch of trick shots

24:16

and just have a good time.

24:17

- Yes, Chosen, I dare you once again to eat shit.

24:19

- What kind of trick shot should I do?

24:21

- A back flip. - Yeah.

24:22

- I'm not gonna do a back flip.

24:24

- Okay, fly. - Between the legs.

24:26

How about between the legs? - Swim underwater.

24:28

- Can you see your own asshole?

24:29

- Swimming underwater is, what?

24:30

- Skip and do a back flip.

24:32

- Bend over and see your own asshole. Do it. (laughs)

24:37

- Bend over and see your own asshole.

24:38

Is that what you just said?

24:40

- Yo, I think this guy's got an anal fixation.

24:42

- What the (beep)?

24:43

- Bend over and see your own asshole?

24:44

- Do you want me to, like, hike it like a football?

24:47

- [Daniel] I don't wanna see it.

24:48

I don't wanna see it.

24:50

- [Courtney] I can't keep it together.

24:52

- That was actually pretty good.

24:53

- Why was that better- - Damn it.

24:54

- Than my last three turns? (people offscreen laughing)

24:58

- What the (beep)?

25:00

- Damn it.

25:02

Welp, I think I just won. - [Daniel] What is going on?

25:05

- Yep, that's 25, so.

25:07

Wait, do I need to get exact? Did I bust?

25:09

No! I'm no longer chosen.

25:12

- Yo, this guy busted.

25:15

- [Brennan] You go back to 18.

25:16

- Okay, so that counts as nothing.

25:18

- [Brennan] Yes. - Fine. Whatever.

25:19

That was sick as (beep).

25:20

- Thanks for doing what I said again

25:21

and eating shit again. - I didn't eat shit.

25:23

You saw that. Everyone saw that.

25:25

- Did you just put a bird in my ass?

25:26

- No, no, no. All my birds are accounted for.

25:28

They're right here.

25:29

Your ass is free of feathers.

25:33

- Do you ever have to deal with hawks?

25:36

- Oh yeah. I've dealt with hawks.

25:37

Actually, my brother dealt with a hawk.

25:39

He's no longer with us.

25:41

- He was a little guy, you see.

25:44

- The hawk took him.

25:45

(dramatic music)

25:46

- [Chosen] What? How? - [Daniel] Pretty sad.

25:48

- What the hell? - That sucks.

25:50

God is against you.

25:54

- What the (beep)?

25:55

- Dealt with a bald eagle though.

25:57

Woo! Those talons can rip a skin off.

25:59

That's why I stick with doves.

26:02

- Okay, how about this?

26:03

How about I do it all over again?

26:05

- No.

26:06

- Hey, I thought I'd ask.

26:09

- [Fred] What?

26:11

- [Chosen] What the (beep) was that?

26:12

- [Gerald] What was that?

26:13

While you're holding all of your birds.

26:16

- What the hell are you doing?

26:20

(Shayne laughing)

26:22

- All right, thought I'd try something.

26:24

Didn't quite work.

26:25

- One.

26:29

Two.

26:30

- [Chosen] Wow, finally getting points.

26:32

- [Daniel] Whoa. - Three.

26:33

- Okay.

26:35

Aw.

26:37

I think you managed to get two darts on the board,

26:39

but they're worth four points total.

26:41

- [Offscreen] Six.

26:42

- Oh six. Oh, sorry. Yeah. Pretty good.

26:44

- Count your blessings.

26:46

- It's time for me to get 18.

26:49

- I'm a full head ahead of you. Taller.

26:53

- What is that?

26:54

- [Offscreen] Two. That's two.

26:54

- [Chosen] Two? Okay.

26:56

- [Daniel] Nina wants to hang out here.

26:57

- Fine. - Is that okay?

27:01

- All right.

27:02

Seven.

27:03

Down to 11.

27:04

- It's all right, Nina.

27:06

Come on.

27:08

She wants to hang out right here. Is that all right?

27:10

- Yeah. - Inch my way closer

27:12

to success. - All right, Nina.

27:13

- The offer still stands for you to get the (beep) out.

27:17

- All right, Nina, you stay.

27:20

(beep)

27:21

(dramatic music)

27:28

Jesus Christ.

27:29

- I'm on my way.

27:30

- [Daniel] Birds are like kids.

27:33

- I'm on

27:35

- [Daniel] They're tough. - You can't even handle

27:36

three of them.

27:37

- No, I can't, but I want six.

27:39

- You talking to me, son?

27:40

- I was talking to her, them, they.

27:43

(Shayne laughing)

27:45

- Slay.

27:46

- What if I threw one so hard it pierced the dartboard?

27:49

- I think actually, at that point, we'd let you win.

27:52

Go for it. - Ow.

27:54

Mr. Cakes, that hurt.

27:56

- Looks like someone needs to work on their thumb meat.

27:58

- My brother didn't work on his thumb meat.

28:01

- Then an eagle got him?

28:02

- A hawk.

28:03

Two very different things. - How big was your brother?

28:06

- What? - How big was this hawk?

28:09

- Hawk was massive. It was like a dragon size.

28:11

- His name was Ethan.

28:14

- Nice. "Mission Impossible" reference.

28:18

- [Fred] That's Ethan Hunt. - No, that's Ethan Hunt.

28:19

- Shit. - His name was Hudson.

28:21

- Ethan Hawke is "Before Sunset", all right, buddy?

28:23

- [Chosen] Yeah, I know that.

28:25

- I thought that was, like, one of your favorite series.

28:27

- No, that's Shayne Topp.

28:29

- Oh yeah, you're right.

28:32

Oh!

28:33

(dramatic music)

28:35

- [Offscreen] Ooh.

28:36

- [Gerald] 32 plus 25. - [Offscreen] That's 57.

28:41

- All I gotta do is believe in myself

28:42

and talk about my brother.

28:44

Really helps clear my way.

28:47

- How about try not to fly too close to the sun?

28:49

- That's right. Your Icarus trick.

28:51

- Yo, Icarus, try Sisyphus.

28:56

- You keep managing to get one point.

28:58

- [Fred] That's two.

29:00

- Okay, impressive.

29:03

- Slow and steady

29:06

wins the race.

29:08

- I bet this works.

29:11

- [Offscreen 2] Fred, 191.

29:14

Gerald. - Fred, 62.

29:16

- [Offscreen 2] 91.

29:18

Daniel, 56. - Yes.

29:20

- [Offscreen 2] Chosen, 11.

29:23

- 11 points.

29:24

- [Offscreen 2] Hovering around 11.

29:25

- [Daniel] Okay. - Okay.

29:26

- 11 years old. - [Daniel] Okay.

29:28

- I'm aiming for the left there.

29:30

(dramatic music)

29:32

- [Daniel] Yikes.

29:34

Nah. - Damn it.

29:35

- [Gerald] Weak.

29:37

- [Daniel] Uh-uh.

29:38

- Oh God.

29:40

- Woo! That one flew like there was wind in here.

29:42

- It hit the whole wall. - Sorry.

29:44

(dramatic music)

29:48

Okay.

29:51

(beep)

29:53

- Well, you're not taking the cakes this time.

29:54

- The solid wall hits are

29:55

- [Gerald] Yeah.

29:56

- Just go boom. - Solid wall hits.

30:00

- It's more on the red, I'll be honest.

30:02

- [Daniel] Six.

30:03

- [Offscreen] That's a two turn.

30:04

- [Daniel] It's six.

30:05

- Yo, that first dart hit looks

30:06

like Mola Ram falling off the cliff

30:08

in "Temple of Doom". - What?

30:11

- That was for Brennan.

30:12

- Fred Durst watches

30:14

- Steven Spielberg, greatest living filmmaker. Yeah.

30:16

(dramatic music)

30:24

- [Chosen] No fricking (beep)

30:25

- 18.

30:27

Suck on those toes.

30:29

- Wow.

30:30

- Why would you say something like that?

30:31

- I didn't have Nina. I don't know.

30:32

She brings me peace.

30:33

- How do you keep such high spirits?

30:36

- My mom, Nancy.

30:39

She cooks for me every night.

30:40

And my girlfriend. - What are you eating?

30:42

- Meatloaf. - Okay.

30:44

- Is that all she makes? - Yeah.

30:46

Meat smothered in any kind of sauce is her forte.

30:49

- What's the prize sauce?

30:50

What do you use sauce most on sauce?

30:51

- Ketchup. - Okay.

30:52

(rock music)

30:54

- [Daniel] What?

30:56

- Yep, that's to be expected.

30:57

- Take a look around.

30:59

(everyone laughing)

31:00

(rock music)

31:07

- You still managed to not get any points.

31:10

- So nobody looked.

31:12

- Nobody looked away. - Nobody looked.

31:13

- And you pointed at us.

31:15

- Yeah, that was - That was just a bit.

31:18

Can I do that again? - No.

31:20

- [Daniel] No. - No, that was your turn.

31:22

You fully took it.

31:23

- Man, it's just one of those days.

31:25

- Okay. Hey, there you go.

31:27

- 19.

31:28

- Put you out of all of your misery right now.

31:31

- [Gerald] Okay.

31:33

- [Chosen] Shit. - Seven.

31:34

- Still in our misery. - And that's-

31:36

- [Offscreen] Yeah, it's over.

31:37

- That's my turn.

31:38

- [Offscreen] Unless, okay.

31:39

I'll give it to you- - [Daniel] What?

31:40

- [Offscreen] If you can hit it down.

31:42

- Oh, okay.

31:44

- [Offscreen] If you can move it.

31:44

- All right, if I can knock that dart down,

31:46

then it doesn't count.

31:48

Dang it. - What the?

31:51

Ah!

31:53

- Damn it though, but I don't get anything.

31:54

Fricking whatever.

31:55

- Okay, that was pretty epic.

31:58

- I know.

31:59

- That was some chosen shit.

32:00

- Yeah, that's why they call me that.

32:02

- Oh, is that why you have the wolves howling at the moon?

32:05

All three of them? - Yeah.

32:07

- Do you have names for them?

32:08

- [Gerald] My whole life, I've been

32:09

- Pinta.

32:10

(Shayne and Spencer laughing)

32:16

- My whole life I've been scrutinized

32:18

for the size of my ass.

32:20

It's hard to live out here

32:21

'cause you just keep getting judged

32:22

because you have such a big ass.

32:23

And that's where the anger comes from.

32:25

I'm just clarifying.

32:27

- And I apologize for saying it sounded like a cushion.

32:27

- I'm not apologizing.

32:29

- It looks like a cushion.

32:31

I'm very sorry about that. It looks great.

32:33

- This is my life.

32:34

I'm on my way.

32:37

- Oh boy.

32:39

- [Chosen] Yep, that's pretty rough.

32:43

Okay.

32:44

- Dang. - [Chosen] Nothing.

32:49

- [Daniel] Woo!

32:50

- Really worked its way down there.

32:51

- That one danced its way down. A little salsa.

32:54

38 points. Done and dusted.

32:57

- I did not choose to be chosen.

32:59

- Wow, everyone whispers when Amanda goes.

33:00

- Wait.

33:02

(Shayne laughing)

33:05

- [Offscreen] Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

33:06

- Wait, wait, what does she need at first?

33:09

Does she need 36?

33:10

- Release the doves.

33:11

- [Offscreen] 18 times three is 54.

33:13

She's way over. - Sorry.

33:15

You've unfortunately busted. - [Fred] You busted.

33:17

- So wait, does that mean I get nothing?

33:19

- [Offscreen] Yes. - The (beep)?

33:20

- That's how it works.

33:21

- Look at how epic this is.

33:24

- [Chosen] It's pretty epic. - I don't let life

33:25

get to me, but that - Epic failure.

33:32

- It's okay. I forgive you, man.

33:35

- Don't touch me.

33:35

- I don't. I don't. Do you wanna hold Nina?

33:38

- No. - All right.

33:39

- All I need is four bullseyes.

33:43

- Jesus. - Let me get back here.

33:44

- One.

33:45

- This is tragic.

33:48

God. - Come on, Fred.

33:50

- Two.

33:54

- Oh boy.

33:58

Fred, not doing so hot.

33:59

- It's just one of those days when you don't wanna wake up.

34:02

Everybody sucks. - [Offscreen] Yes.

34:06

- And you don't know why.

34:07

- Oh, and the microphone? Go for it.

34:08

- Justify ripping someone's head off.

34:11

- I did not know you had a microphone.

34:13

- No human contact.

34:16

And if you interact,

34:17

your life is on contract.

34:20

- That was excellent.

34:22

- Your best bet is to stay away.

34:24

(rock music)

34:27

- Holy shit. - Woo!

34:29

- [Chosen] All right. - Holy shit.

34:30

- That was excellent. - You brought the mic out.

34:31

- Time to get 11. - Free concert.

34:34

- Time to use more of my power than before.

34:38

- [Daniel] Jesus Christ.

34:40

- Okay, that's three.

34:41

All right, so I'm at eight. Okay.

34:45

Four.

34:46

So,

34:49

seven.

34:50

- [Gerald] Get seven. Get seven.

34:51

- Get seven.

34:53

Damn it.

34:54

- If you didn't throw it too hard, you would've gotten it.

34:57

- Darts get seventh. - Pathetic.

35:00

- All right, seven points.

35:02

- I'm on my way.

35:04

(dramatic music)

35:07

- Okay.

35:10

(beep) (Spencer laughing)

35:12

- Salsa dancer on the loose.

35:15

- Use more power.

35:18

- How dare you? - What?

35:20

- How dare you?

35:23

Don't ever, don't ever

35:25

- This is like the first scene from "Jurassic Park".

35:29

- Don't you ever say anything ever again.

35:32

- Okay, sorry. I just wanted Nina to solve any issues.

35:35

- I'm on my way. This I swear.

35:40

- [Chosen] What?

35:41

(beep) - Woo!

35:43

Nice.

35:45

Well done.

35:46

- [Fred] That was really cool.

35:48

- [Daniel] Oh God.

35:49

- Why do you wear a flannel if you have to keep

35:53

kind of taking it off?

35:54

- Yeah, you should just have a,

35:56

you should just have a short shirt.

35:58

- Yeah, you could wear a crop top if you wanted.

36:00

I mean, nobody would judge you for it.

36:01

- You keep showing it, and you don't want anybody

36:03

to talk about it, but if you just wore a short shirt.

36:09

(Shayne laughing) - [Fred] Gulp.

36:10

(Courtney laughing)

36:11

- 38. Huh.

36:14

Done and dusted. - The age I will become a man.

36:16

- Try not to get so many points this time, Daniel.

36:18

38.

36:19

(dramatic music)

36:22

- [Offscreen] Okay.

36:23

- 20.

36:25

So 18.

36:26

(dramatic music)

36:30

- [Offscreen] Okay. - What's that? 22?

36:32

- [Offscreen] Now you need 16.

36:34

- Get 16. There's a 16 on there.

36:37

(beep)

36:39

- [Offscreen] That does still count. That's 20,22.

36:42

- [Daniel] That's a triple.

36:43

- [Offscreen] That's 28 points.

36:44

- I need 10.

36:46

- Shit.

36:47

This is getting brutal.

36:48

- [Daniel] Okay, Chosen.

36:49

- I can come back. I can come back.

36:51

- I must say, Daniel, I'm impressed.

36:55

- Thanks.

36:56

- You're one of the most awesome Daniels

36:58

I've ever met besides Daniel Bryan.

37:02

- Who's that?

37:03

- Pretty disappointed in everyone in this room.

37:04

- No, I got it. It was a weird reference.

37:07

- What? Of course Chosen would know WWE.

37:09

- Who's Daniel Bryan? - He's a wrestler.

37:11

- Oh. - Oh, a wrestler.

37:13

- That's like the most boring name

37:15

I've ever heard in my life.

37:16

- Yeah. Kind of his whole thing.

37:18

- I watch horseback riding on TV, not wrestling.

37:21

- You watch horseback riding on TV?

37:22

- Yes, sir. - Is there a channel for that?

37:24

- Yep. - What's the channel?

37:26

- Horses.

37:27

(Courtney laughing)

37:30

Pretty epic. - It's just horses?

37:31

- Couple people fall off.

37:32

- Oh. (rock music)

37:34

- [Daniel] Hey! Hey, Fred.

37:35

- What?

37:37

- He cheated.

37:39

Fred, in a time when we're trying to make a connection,

37:41

you just cheated.

37:43

How do you feel?

37:44

Okay, he doesn't give a (beep).

37:45

- Okay, finally getting points.

37:48

I like how you ran up and did that and you still

37:50

- What happened there?

37:52

- There's a ghost in this room.

37:53

- There really is.

37:54

- 39 plus nine.

37:57

47. 48.

37:59

(people offscreen laughing)

38:00

- Hello?

38:01

- It's been a long time since third grade.

38:05

You see, when I was in third grade,

38:08

I thought I was gay

38:09

because I could draw. - What the (beep)?

38:12

- Those are real Macklemore lyrics.

38:14

- Macklemore.

38:16

All right, I need seven.

38:18

- [Daniel] You're not gay.

38:19

- Let's see if you can - All right.

38:21

- Let's see, let's see.

38:25

- All right, it's time to end this. Seven.

38:29

Okay.

38:30

- It goes straight through the wall.

38:32

- Let's see if you won't shit the bed this time, Chosen.

38:35

- Who's shitting the bed? - Seven.

38:37

Shit. Okay.

38:38

- Whoa, you're really getting to him, Cakes.

38:39

- Focus. - Keep going.

38:40

- I'm in your head.

38:41

- [Chosen] Damn it. - I'm in your head.

38:43

- Shit.

38:44

- What do you say we turn on a little music?

38:47

(light music)

38:49

(Amanda humming)

38:53

- [Daniel] All right.

38:55

- Put that thing away.

38:59

- Oh boy.

39:00

- I'm on my way. - Oh boy.

39:05

Oh. - 16?

39:07

- Nope. - Nope. My bad.

39:10

- Oh, should've had Nina.

39:12

- This is a safe space to say I hate Nina.

39:18

Yeah.

39:19

- It's okay.

39:21

It's okay.

39:22

I let my anger get to that place and then I hug.

39:25

You okay, Cakes?

39:27

- I'm just cracking my back.

39:29

- How do you crack your back?

39:30

- Just (mumbles).

39:33

- You just twist?

39:37

(bones cracking)

39:39

Whoa.

39:40

(light music) - All right.

39:44

- [Zoe] I hate to ask, but was that zero?

39:47

- Yeah. (Spencer laughing)

39:50

Yeah, it was zero.

39:51

You can count on that.

39:52

- Zero the hero, as they say.

39:55

Right, Chosen?

39:58

- All right, Nina,

40:00

we need 10 points.

40:01

(dramatic music)

40:04

(beep) you.

40:05

- Throw it really hard.

40:06

- [Chosen] You gotta knock it off.

40:09

Nope.

40:13

Welp, too bad.

40:16

- I got 12 when I needed 10.

40:18

Okay, Nina, that didn't work out so well.

40:21

- Okay, actually pretty good.

40:24

All right.

40:25

Jesus. What the (beep)? - 71.

40:27

- What?

40:28

- My favorite Green Day song, 71 Guns.

40:31

- Listen, Chosen.

40:33

Chosen.

40:36

You win this game right now,

40:41

I will end it all.

40:42

- [Offscreen] How much does Chosen need?

40:44

- I need seven.

40:46

Gerald, wielding that blade

40:48

brings a terrible curse upon its wielder as well.

40:52

You do not want that burden.

40:55

I suggest you put it down.

40:58

Besides, I'm about to win.

41:01

(beep) I got eight.

41:04

Kidding me?

41:05

All right, I will knock it down.

41:07

Goddamn it.

41:08

All right, if I still knock down the eight, then I got five.

41:12

Ah, shit, I got

41:13

Goddamn it, now I did really well.

41:16

Shit.

41:18

- I'm still in the running.

41:19

- Frick. - Thanks for eating shit.

41:21

- (beep) you.

41:23

(everyone laughing)

41:27

- This is the one character that pisses The Chosen off.

41:29

- The Chosen hates Gerald Cakes.

41:31

- Chosen hates him. - I'll (beep) kill you.

41:33

- I'll (beep) kill you. (laughs)

41:36

(dramatic music)

41:39

I can talk shit too.

41:42

I will be the demon on both of your shoulders.

41:45

- Believe me, Chosen, it is my mission

41:47

to get under your skin, and I have.

41:50

- Oh yeah? Who sent you? The CIA?

41:53

- The other one.

41:54

- (beep) The anti-CIA.

41:56

(dramatic music)

41:58

- I'm on my way.

42:05

- Birds. The birds can't save you.

42:09

- Have you guys ever seen those shirts that say

42:10

FBI, Female Body Inspector?

42:14

Yeah, I made those.

42:16

- [Chosen] Well, 2002 was a big year for you then.

42:18

- [Fred] Yeah.

42:20

I'm Fred Darts.

42:21

(Shayne laughing)

42:22

- Fred Darst.

42:25

- I'm on my way.

42:28

(dramatic music)

42:31

- [Daniel] Uh-oh.

42:32

- You probably should just put a little more

42:34

torque into the throw. - Not happy.

42:36

Not happy.

42:38

Uh-oh.

42:39

Oh God, I'm always the one that gets the handshake

42:41

that rips my soul.

42:44

Oh boy.

42:45

- [Chosen] There it is.

42:46

- [Daniel] Oh God. Oh.

42:48

- Zero, Zoe. (everyone laughing)

42:52

- Ow.

42:54

Ow. Ow.

42:56

- You're lucky you have a kind soul.

42:58

- Thank you. Thank you, I do.

43:01

You scare me.

43:02

Mr. Cakes, I'd love to talk after this.

43:07

- What kind of talk?

43:09

- An assistant.

43:10

- Oh God, no.

43:11

- What do you need assistance for?

43:12

- Why? No.

43:13

- I need someone to help me with the birds.

43:15

It's very hard to put them in the car.

43:16

- You have like two birds. Just (beep) manage them.

43:18

- There's a different kind of hep you need.

43:19

- I have three birds and this is just the half of it.

43:22

- Where's the other half of your birds?

43:24

- They're at my mom's farm.

43:25

God, do you guys not care or listen to me?

43:27

10 is all I have to get.

43:28

- Out of all of my challenges,

43:30

being stuck in a room with you three

43:31

is the worst thing I've ever dealt with.

43:34

Jesus Christ. Well, you busted.

43:36

- Three. No, that's three.

43:37

- [Chosen] That's three.

43:39

Okay. - That's three.

43:39

- [Chosen] All right, so you're at seven as well.

43:42

Bravo. Until you bust.

43:45

- Shut up.

43:49

(beep)

43:51

So I have three. So now I have to get to seven.

43:53

- [Gerald] He needs complete silence.

43:54

- I would try to psych you out,

43:55

but I just kind of feel bad for you at this point, so.

44:00

- [Daniel] Oh. - Okay.

44:02

- That's something. - It's something.

44:04

Oh, you got seven. Goddamn.

44:07

All right.

44:08

- 19, 7,

44:11

13. - [Offscreen] 39.

44:13

- Just shouting numbers.

44:14

- [Offscreen] How much does Fred need?

44:16

- [Offscreen 2] 14.

44:18

- What? How did we get here?

44:20

- You tell me. - Jesus Christ.

44:22

- How much does Cakes need?

44:25

- [Zoe] Cakes need 85. And that's okay.

44:27

- All right.

44:29

85 is better than seven. My god, seven is impossible.

44:31

- My whole life has been a struggle.

44:34

- Seven points. Here we go.

44:36

- [Fred] Seven pounds.

44:37

- God, I fricking hit it.

44:39

You guys saw that. It hit the seven.

44:40

- No, I didn't see anything. - I saw nothing.

44:41

- About to hit the seven now.

44:45

Damn it.

44:45

- You hit 17, so it's not gonna

44:46

- You busted.

44:47

- Okay, if I hit the seven hard enough,

44:49

I will knock the one that's hit 17 out.

44:54

Goddamn it. - Good job, Chosen.

45:00

- Be wary.

45:01

(dramatic music)

45:05

- [Daniel] I never know what's gonna happen with those two.

45:07

- You don't know the meaning of the word chosen.

45:10

I'm on my way.

45:13

(Shayne laughing)

45:18

- [Daniel] Well, Mr. Cakes.

45:20

- [Chosen] On your way to what?

45:22

- Where are you headed?

45:24

'Cause it's not to the winning finish line.

45:30

- On their way to hitting the wall really hard.

45:34

- Yep.

45:36

All right, Daniel.

45:39

- Okay. - Get eight.

45:42

- No.

45:45

Seven. (Spencer laughing)

45:47

Why would you say that?

45:49

Are you crazy?

45:51

- It's called trickery.

45:52

- Well, it didn't work on me.

45:54

- Well, it nearly did.

45:55

- No, it didn't.

45:56

- Worked for like a split second.

45:57

- Stop yet. Stop yet mouth.

45:59

- [Chosen] Yeah, whatever.

46:00

- [Gerald] Hello? - Stop your Smosh Mouth.

46:01

- Stop yet mouth.

46:04

(dramatic music)

46:07

- [Offscreen] It's three, four.

46:09

- Well.

46:11

- Congratulations. You made it harder on yourself.

46:13

(dramatic music)

46:19

Oh shit.

46:20

(dramatic music)

46:26

- What the hell was that?

46:28

- So now I just need four.

46:30

Bummer.

46:31

(dramatic music)

46:33

I don't know what that is.

46:34

- It's 11. - So you need three.

46:38

- Get three, son.

46:39

(dramatic music)

46:42

- Oh.

46:43

- Nice.

46:45

- [Gerald] Aim for three.

46:50

- It seems I'm closer to winning than you bozos.

46:54

- I'm not a bozo. My name is Daniel Terry.

46:59

- Nice. - You busted.

47:01

(people offscreen laughing)

47:02

- I will hit seven with so much force

47:04

that the other one will fall off.

47:07

- Whoa. - [Daniel] Whoa.

47:08

- Weird. What happened just now?

47:09

- [Fred] It was an impressive throw though.

47:10

(dramatic music)

47:13

- Okay. Oh, sorry. Oh my God, I'm sorry.

47:16

I'm sorry. The butt. Sorry.

47:20

You all right?

47:21

- You sure that doesn't count for anything?

47:24

(light music)

47:31

- That's what I needed. - 24.

47:34

The age I became a man.

47:36

- [Offscreen] 21.

47:37

- My favorite Kiefer Sutherland show.

47:39

Next to the one where he's the president.

47:42

- It was 21, Chosen.

47:43

- Oh. - Oh, sorry.

47:45

- I'm coming for you. - I know. I got you.

47:48

- I come for no one. - What was it called?

47:50

- Like, next in line or something.

47:52

- Yep. Next in line. I love that.

47:55

Okay, so I need four.

47:57

All right, Nina, Pinta, let's do this.

48:01

- [Gerald] Pinta?

48:02

- That's kind of a (beep) up reference.

48:06

- Their intentions were, okay, dubious at best.

48:09

- What am I to be expected when they're Portuguese?

48:13

(everyone laughing)

48:17

- Okay, Daniel Terry's on his way,

48:20

but not like that.

48:21

(dramatic music)

48:23

What the (beep)?

48:24

(everyone laughing)

48:28

What the (beep)? - Wow. Really lost it.

48:32

Jesus Christ.

48:33

- [Gerald] Where did this power come from?

48:34

- I got all messed up there.

48:36

- Do you hear that? It's the sound of the wall shivering.

48:39

Y'all mind if I run up? - Run up.

48:41

- Yes, we do. - Just don't go

48:42

onto the carpet. - Run up.

48:44

- Not on the rug. - Ease up, little guy.

48:46

Whoa, okay. - Jesus Christ.

48:47

- That kind of running up is okay. That's fine.

48:48

- You need three points.

48:51

- Do a squat. Jump up.

48:52

- Squat, jump up, and throw.

48:53

Hustle. Hustle. Good hustle. Good hustle.

48:55

- [Daniel] Okay, nevermind. - [Gerald] Good hustle.

48:57

- I don't even know where it went.

48:58

(rock music)

48:59

- [Gerald] Good lumbar.

49:01

- If he wins, I swear to God.

49:02

(rock music)

49:04

Oh.

49:07

- It's just one of those days.

49:09

(Amanda laughing)

49:14

- Oh boy.

49:15

- Away speed run. Let's go.

49:17

- Seven. Let's go.

49:21

Five. Okay, I need two points.

49:23

Where's the two?

49:24

Is there even a two? - [Daniel] Next to the 15.

49:26

- [Offscreen] Bottom right.

49:27

- Okay, okay, okay, okay. Here we go.

49:28

- Use your eyes, Chosen. - Shit.

49:30

- [Fred] Boom, boom, pow. - Calm down.

49:34

- [Daniel] Wow. - I will get it.

49:35

(rock music)

49:41

More power.

49:43

- [Daniel] Oh.

49:46

- That's 16. Just 16?

49:48

- [Daniel] Yep.

49:49

- [Fred] Unfortunately, yes.

49:51

- 16. - All right.

49:53

Let's pick up the pace.

49:54

- We are.

49:56

- Go, Daniel.

49:58

- Woo!

50:00

- Bullseye. Congratulations. You lost.

50:04

- Woo! That's what I actually needed.

50:08

(beep) (beep)

50:12

(beep)

50:13

(rock music)

50:16

No bueno.

50:18

- Oh, you really.

50:20

Well, great job.

50:21

Two. Here we go.

50:24

- Oh God. - Damn it.

50:25

That's on the triple.

50:26

(everyone laughing)

50:28

Wait, is it?

50:29

- [Daniel] Yes. - [Offscreen] Yes, it is.

50:31

- It's on the line. Okay. Shit. Okay.

50:34

Maybe I can knock it down.

50:38

(Spencer laughing)

50:39

- [Daniel] You're gonna put a hole on the wall, man.

50:41

- God. (laughs)

50:45

Shit! (beep) you.

50:49

(beep)

50:50

- Oh.

50:52

What in the? (Spencer laughing)

50:58

- That one stuck.

50:59

Just want you guys all to be aware

51:01

that I've been shooting with three birds this whole time,

51:03

so just keep that in mind- - Yeah, nobody cares.

51:05

- When I win. - Yeah, really. Okay.

51:07

Good information. - (beep) you.

51:08

- [Chosen] Yep, there we go. - Nice shot.

51:11

Okay.

51:13

- [Chosen] Wait.

51:15

(beep)

51:16

- Did it all for the nookie.

51:19

I did it off for the nookie.

51:22

- [Daniel] I guess not.

51:24

- So you can take that cookie.

51:26

- Wow. All right.

51:27

- [Daniel] I guess not, man.

51:29

- [Chosen] Okay. - No nookie tonight.

51:33

- No nookie was had.

51:34

- You leave a cookie out for Santa Claus,

51:35

so he can leave me out some nookie.

51:37

- If you give a mouse a nookie.

51:40

Here you go. Two. Shit.

51:43

- [Fred] Y'all been to crumble nookies?

51:45

- One.

51:48

Another one. Here we go.

51:50

Goddamn it.

51:51

All right, so I need one point.

51:55

- [Daniel] Good luck. - I'm really (beep) here.

51:57

(rock music)

51:58

- [Fred] Oh my God. - Oh my God.

51:59

- What if Gerald somehow manages to do this?

52:02

(rock music)

52:05

Oh, I keep forgetting that God hates him.

52:07

(everyone laughing)

52:09

- Ouch. - Why God cursed him

52:10

with this voluptuous bottom.

52:13

- Wait, what is that?

52:18

All right. - Wait, how many was that?

52:19

(Shayne laughing)

52:20

- [Chosen] Wait, everyone stop.

52:24

- (beep) off. - [Chosen] And that's

52:26

a lot of points.

52:27

(beep)

52:29

Well, you can knock it down.

52:33

(beep)

52:34

- (beep) you. - [Chosen] Sorry.

52:37

- Let's go.

52:39

Nope. - Nope.

52:41

- Let's get it.

52:43

- [Daniel] Uh-uh.

52:44

- Nothing.

52:46

- That was pathetic.

52:49

- [Daniel] Definitely not.

52:52

- Never has one point

52:53

ever been so difficult to attain,

52:57

but I'm about to do it.

52:59

One.

53:01

Okay, I missed. Good.

53:05

- Yeah. Dancer. (Spencer laughing)

53:10

- Ah! - Ah.

53:12

- I mean, technically you hit the one.

53:13

- [Daniel] No. - [Fred] Oh.

53:15

- So sorry you gobbled up on shit again, Chosen.

53:17

- Jesus Christ.

53:22

- Okay, there's that butt again.

53:24

It's just for me, I guess.

53:26

- [Chosen] Really helping him out.

53:28

Yep. - Dancer.

53:30

- [Chosen] All right.

53:33

Okay.

53:34

(dramatic music)

53:38

- 15.

53:39

- That's right. - So you have 15 left.

53:41

- So I'm not that back.

53:42

(beep) - Jesus Christ.

53:45

- Okay.

53:48

- There is hope yet.

53:51

- Rebellions are built on hope.

53:54

- Not expected that from from you.

53:55

- Zero.

53:59

- 17 again?

54:02

(Courtney laughing)

54:03

(dramatic music)

54:06

- Way to go.

54:07

- The best you've ever played.

54:07

- You finally got points.

54:09

- I figured out darts though.

54:11

- [Chosen] Okay, here we go. - Good news, everyone.

54:13

- [Daniel] How many do you need? Three?

54:14

- One.

54:16

Shit. Two.

54:17

- [Fred] That is crazy. - That's crazy.

54:19

- Goddamn it. Shit.

54:24

- Is it true that they're planning

54:25

a wenching hour around here?

54:28

- No.

54:29

- Dang, I would've stuck around.

54:34

- God, I can't not look.

54:35

(dramatic music)

54:37

Dancer.

54:38

(dramatic music)

54:46

- [Offscreen] I'll give that a 3 and 7 for 10.

54:48

- Nice.

54:49

So how many do you have left? - So it's anyone's game.

54:52

- Five. - All right.

54:54

- Let's get the show on the road.

54:55

- I told you.

54:56

- [Chosen] Let's pick up the pace.

54:57

- I'm on my way.

55:01

- Jesus.

55:03

Was that? Shit. - No, I'd say that's more,

55:05

I'd say that's, I'd say that's more on four.

55:08

- You should check, Alex.

55:09

- [Alex] I have to be the final eyes on this?

55:10

- Because if it's four, then I win.

55:13

(dramatic music)

55:18

- Congratulations.

55:19

- [Chosen] Shit. - Ah shit.

55:21

- Release the doves! - Oh man.

55:24

- Release the doves. - What the heck?

55:26

- Release the doves.

55:28

Hello, I'm Daniel Terry and I'm the winner of darts,

55:31

and I'm looking for a new assistant

55:33

and it looks like it's gonna be The Chosen.

55:36

(everyone clapping)

55:38

- Congratulations, Daniel Terry,

55:39

you are now the champion of darts.

55:41

- Thank you.

55:42

Meatloaf is on my mom, so who's in there?

55:45

- Looks like we both ate shit today,

55:48

but at least I did it in style.

55:51

(upbeat music)

55:53

- Oh boy. - This has been darts.

55:55

Let us know what other competitors you'd like to see here,

55:58

or what other games you'd like to see played in the arena.

56:03

We'll see you next time.

56:05

Goodbye.

56:06

- Woo! Venmo me my day rate.

56:09

(everyone laughing)

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