Jon Stewart, Jordan Klepper & Ronny Chieng Cover Trump's Hush Money Trial | The Daily Show
Summary
TLDRThe video script discusses the opening statements in a trial involving Donald Trump, where the prosecution argues that his alleged scheme to silence an adult film actress constitutes election interference. The defense counters that Trump did not violate the law. The trial is portrayed as a test for the American legal system and the media's responsibility. The script also touches on Trump's legal team arguing for presidential immunity at the Supreme Court, his campaign activities, and the handling of protests on college campuses against Israel's actions in Gaza. It criticizes the use of force to quell protests and calls for listening to the protesters' concerns before responding.
Takeaways
- π’ The trial of Donald Trump has begun, with the prosecution arguing that his alleged scheme to silence an adult film actress constituted election interference, while the defense claims he did not violate the law.
- π€ The media's coverage of the trial is being scrutinized for its responsibility and fairness, with a call for a focus on the issues at hand rather than sensationalism.
- π¨ Trump's defense lawyer, Todd Blanch, argues that the case is a test of the American legal system's fairness and the media's ability to responsibly cover Trump.
- ποΈ The trial is being described as potentially the 'trial of the century,' highlighting its significance and the intense media and public interest.
- π¨ The former president is facing legal challenges on multiple fronts, including issues related to a gag order and alleged violations of it.
- π€·ββοΈ There is criticism of the media's focus on Trump's every movement and expression during the trial, rather than the substance of the proceedings.
- π€ Trump's demeanor in court is noted, with mentions of him appearing miserable and even falling asleep during his criminal trial.
- πΈ The head of the National Enquirer, David Pecker, testified about his involvement in buying and burying negative stories about Trump to aid in his 2016 election win.
- π¨ Trump's lawyers argued for complete legal immunity for any actions taken by the president while in office, a move that could have significant implications for presidential power and accountability.
- π The Supreme Court's conservative majority appeared open to the idea of limited immunity for official acts by presidents, which could potentially protect Trump from legal consequences.
- ποΈ Trump made a campaign stop at a construction site, engaging with workers and highlighting his connection to New York and its construction industry.
Q & A
What is the central issue in the trial mentioned in the transcript?
-The central issue in the trial is whether Donald Trump's alleged scheme to keep an adult film actress quiet constitutes election interference.
What does the defense lawyer, Todd Blanch, argue about the former president's actions?
-Todd Blanch argues that despite the allegations, the former president did not violate the law.
How does the transcript suggest the media should cover Donald Trump?
-The transcript suggests that the media should cover Donald Trump in a responsible way, focusing on the issues at hand and avoiding speculation and sensationalism.
What is the significance of the gag order hearing in the context of the trial?
-The gag order hearing is significant because it determines whether Donald Trump's actions, such as threatening jurors and witnesses, violate the gag order and if he should face penalties for these actions.
What is the role of the National Enquirer's editor in the trial?
-The editor of the National Enquirer, David Pecker, testifies about his involvement in buying and burying scandalous stories about Trump to help him win the 2016 election.
What is the potential penalty for violating the gag order as mentioned in the transcript?
-The potential penalty for violating the gag order could be up to $1,000 per violation.
What does the transcript imply about the media's past performance in covering Donald Trump?
-The transcript implies that the media has acknowledged performing poorly in the past, often getting distracted and focusing on insignificant details.
What is the general sentiment expressed in the transcript about the American legal system?
-The transcript expresses that the trial will be a test of the fairness of the American legal system.
What is the transcript's commentary on the portrayal of Donald Trump in the media?
-The transcript criticizes the media for potentially creating a spectacle and focusing too much on Donald Trump's every movement and expression, rather than the substance of the trial.
What does the transcript suggest about the public's perception of the trial?
-The transcript suggests that the public may view the trial as a significant historical event, possibly 'the trial of the century,' and that there is a great deal of media attention and speculation surrounding it.
What is the transcript's stance on the importance of responsible media coverage?
-The transcript emphasizes the importance of responsible media coverage, suggesting that it is crucial for the public to receive accurate and significant information about the trial without unnecessary distractions.
Outlines
π’ Opening Statements and Media Responsibility
The video script begins with the opening statements in a trial where the prosecution and defense present their cases. The prosecution argues that Trump allegedly interfered with the election by silencing an adult film actress. Trump's defense lawyer, Todd Blanch, claims the former president did not violate the law. The script also discusses the media's role in covering the trial responsibly, criticizing past performance and urging restraint from speculation and sensationalism. The trial is presented as a test for the American legal system and the media's integrity.
π¨ Artistic License in Courtroom Sketches
The second paragraph focuses on the media's coverage of Donald Trump's courtroom appearance. It humorously questions the depth of an eyewitness account and the value of a courtroom sketch as a source of information. The sketch artist, Christine Cornell, is interviewed about the challenges of drawing Trump from a distance, leading to a satirical discussion about the accuracy and artistic interpretation of the sketch. The paragraph also touches on the media's tendency to focus on trivial details, rather than the substance of the trial.
π΄ Trump's Composure and Gag Order Hearing
This paragraph discusses Donald Trump's behavior during his trial, noting that he fell asleep on multiple days. It covers the testimony of the National Enquirer's editor about burying scandalous stories to aid Trump's 2016 election. The paragraph also highlights a hearing regarding a gag order, where Trump's lawyer, Todd Blanch, argues Trump's caution, leading to a tense exchange with an evidently frustrated judge. The discussion then sarcastically explores the concept of 'freedom of movement' in relation to Trump's trial.
π€·ββοΈ The Irony of 'Cruel and Unusual' Punishment
The script humorously addresses the idea that forcing Trump to sit through his trial is a form of cruel and unusual punishment, comparing it to keeping an Old English sheepdog cooped up. It satirizes the notion that Trump, who has been described as obese for years, needs exercise and sunlight. The paragraph also touches on Trump's public schedule and the perceived danger of disclosing his location, contrasting it with theι«θ° (high-profile) nature of his rallies.
ποΈ Legal Immunity and Presidential Powers
The fifth paragraph delves into the concept of legal immunity for a president, with hypothetical scenarios presented in a courtroom discussion. It covers the debate over whether certain presidential actions, such as ordering an assassination or staging a coup, would qualify for immunity. The paragraph also mentions Trump's legal team using the immunity argument to delay trials and the Supreme Court's conservative majority signaling a willingness to grant some form of immunity for official acts.
π€ Trump's Campaign Stop and College Protests
The final paragraph describes Trump making a campaign stop at a construction site, interacting with workers, and receiving endorsements. It also addresses the issue of protests on college campuses against Israel's actions in Gaza, the challenge of anti-Semitism within these protests, and the need for a balanced approach to maintain safety for Jewish students while respecting the rights of protesters. The script criticizes the use of force to quell protests and the involvement of right-wing politicians in escalating tensions.
Mindmap
Keywords
π‘Jury Selection
π‘Opening Statements
π‘Election Interference
π‘Legal Immunity
π‘Gag Order
π‘Media Coverage
π‘Donald Trump
π‘Supreme Court
π‘College Protests
π‘Anti-Semitism
π‘National Guard
Highlights
The prosecution argues that Trump's alleged scheme to silence an adult film actress constitutes election interference.
Trump's defense lawyer, Todd Blanch, claims the former president did not violate the law.
The trial is seen as a test of the American legal system's fairness and the media's responsibility in covering Trump.
Cable news networks are criticized for providing Trump with excessive free airtime and speculation.
Sketch artist Christine Cornell's depiction of Trump in the courtroom is questioned for its artistic interpretation.
The media is cautioned against sensationalizing Trump's every movement and focusing on the trial's substance.
Trump's gag order hearing becomes a point of contention, with discussions on juror safety and Trump's social media behavior.
Trump's legal team argues for presidential immunity before the Supreme Court, even for extreme hypothetical actions.
The Supreme Court's conservative majority appears open to the idea of limited immunity for official acts by presidents.
Trump makes a campaign stop at a construction site, interacting with workers and discussing his background in New York construction.
College campuses face protests against Israel's actions in Gaza, with concerns about anti-Semitism and student safety.
University administrations are criticized for escalating tensions by involving law enforcement in campus protests.
The importance of listening to students' concerns is emphasized over responding with force.
Trump's former Attorney General, Bill Barr, endorses him despite past criticisms, displaying Trump's penchant for pettiness.
David Pecker, head of the National Enquirer, testifies about his involvement in burying negative stories about Trump.
Trump's lawyers argue for his complete legal immunity for actions taken while president, a notion met with skepticism.
The potential for the Supreme Court to grant the president immunity from the law sparks debate on the principle of 'no Kings' in America.
Transcripts
[Music]
after a week of jury selection today it
was finally time for opening statements
and it turns out the prosecution and the
defense do not see ey to eye the
prosecution arguing that Trump's alleged
scheme to keep an adult film actress
quiet is election interference pure and
simple in those words Trump defense
lawyer Todd blanch told the jury that
the former president though did not
violate the
law that's that's right this is a
classic case of the state of New York
versus
nuh-uh oh no
didn't I think it's pretty clear he did
it anyway this trial will obviously be a
test of the fairness of the American
legal system but it's also a test of the
media's ability to cover Donald Trump in
a responsible way a task they have
acknowledged they've performed poorly in
the past I think to the degree that the
media had lesson turned they seem to
have been learned it's irresponsible for
cable news networks to give Donald Trump
hours and hours of free air time way too
much speculation and liberal wishful
thinking and attempts to connect dots
that did not connect it's the media's
responsibility to not get distracted I
think we were much too busy chasing
after shiny objects all of us have
learned some very valuable lessons from
the last couple of years um and
delineating what's significant what's
important so brave
[Applause]
well done and I think for this trial we
will see the seeds of that inpection
bear
fruit or we will learn that learning
curves are for here we go it's
on it's happening history will be made
shaping up to be the trial of the
century maybe the trial of the century
the trial of the century but just might
be the trial of the century the tax man
is here Donald Trump he will finally be
forced to face the music the legal walls
closing in around Donald Trump the legal
walls are starting to close in on Donald
Trump yes this time Mr
Bond it truly is your doom now if you'll
excuse me I'm going to leave this room
obviously when I leave I'm not going to
press this button right here that opens
all the doors and dismantles the killing
machine I've
established don't follow me Mr
Bond perhaps if we limit the coverage to
the issues at hand and try not to create
an all-encompassing spectacle of the
most BAL of details perhaps that would
help you're looking at live pictures in
New York City of Donald Trump's motor
cave it's about a 20-minute Drive
between Trump Tower and the court
building Trump leaving Trump Tower on
Fifth Avenue they're now making their
way across town along 57 Street they
just cross Park Avenue making their way
up towards lexingon Avenue he's heading
down the FDR to the Manhattan courthouse
on Chamber Street arriving at this
intersection of American history with
Defiance arriving at the intersection of
American history with Defiance the
brilliant ju opposing of the gravitas of
the moment with simple traffic terms
was he arrived at the intersection of
American History where he put a quarter
in the parking meter of
Destiny leaving in the
car looking to avoid stepping in the
urine puddle of Juris
Prudence seriously are we going to
follow this guy to court every day are
you trying to make this OJ it's not a
Chase he's
commuting so the media's first attempt
the very first attempt on the first day
at self-control
failed and I'm sorry to say that it I'm
sorry hold on we're getting breaking
news you know he wanted to get a jury
seated so we had a lady Bill I'm sorry
interrup a perspec for one second I'm I
apologize we're just showing the first
image of Donald Trump from inside the
courtroom it's a still photograph uh
that we're showing there just I want to
make sure our viewers uh know what
they're looking
at yes for our viewers who are are just
waking up from a 30-year
coma uh this is what Donald Trump has
looked like every day for the past 30
years same outfit so we have a
photograph of Donald Trump in the
courtroom but do we really know what he
looks like the man is a mystery a Yeti
if you will anything could be a deep
fake do we have an eyewitness account
perhaps from a dismissed juror would you
describe to me what you saw
with Donald Trump while you were sitting
inside of that courtroom not very much
um he was a bit ahead of me and off to
the left I didn't have a complete view
of him
today wait did I have jury duty this
week what the
BR
brother mother dresses like me too this
is anyway coming up more of our
three-part interview with a guy who
nearly saw Donald Trump in the
courtroom so we have a photograph this
freaking me out that picture we have a
photograph and we have eyewitness
accounts but do we have anything in a
pastel a courtroom sketch that we're
getting in uh right now I'm looking at
the courtroom sketch and Mr Trump looks
like he is glowering I'm not sure if
that's supposed to be a glow or just a a
glance I don't know how uh it's it's
it's art it's not necessarily it's
artistic journalism but it's not a
photograph why are you showing it to us
it's a sketch why would anyone analyze a
sketch like it was it'd be like looking
at the Last Supper and going why do you
think Jesus looks so sad
here what do you think he's what do you
think it's because of
Judas what if we interview one of the
waiters at one of the tables from like a
different section of the restaurant who
maybe didn't actually see him but well
you know we got time to
kill well I guess we'll never know
unless we could talk to the person who
drew the sketch but do we have the time
nothing but Christine Cornell who's in
the court room today the official sketch
artist I want to show one of your
sketches today we're going through some
of them but this one it appears in this
one that his eyes are closed what was
happening
here my apologies ma'am I was sitting 50
ft away I was having such a struggle to
try and get those eyeballs in
damn it
woman does Donald Trump have eyeballs or
no man does he or no you are in the room
tell
me or I will not come to your trinket
shop in
Newports tell me
woman
look what the are we
doing uh I noticed here his head is
perfectly
round why is that well I like drawing
circles at this point you're probably
saying to yourself how many television
hours have they devoted to a Donald
Trump a man who has not been off any of
our screens for more than 30 seconds in
the last eight years looks like the
answer is not nearly as many hours as
describing his every movement Trump
craned his neck to eye perspective
jurors and flashed a tight lip smile
leaning to the left um a little bit
quiet his arm crossed as well hunched
over with his elbows on the desk looked
through papers and periodically
whispered to his attorneys fidgeted and
leaned back the scowl fixed to his face
while he sat squinting he was actually
biting his lip during today's
proceedings his lips pursed in that
characteristic Trump
way his eyeballs
gone the hulking former president stood
up slowly he walked towards me with a
mixture of Desire scorn and let's call
it age related
confusion it was then that I realized
that this former president of the United
States has a front
[Applause]
butt look at some point in this trial
something important and revelatory is
going to happen but none of us are going
to notice because the hour spent on his
speculative facial ticks if the media
tries to make us feel like the most
mundane is Earth shattering we
won't believe you when it's really
interesting it's your classic Boy Who
Cried Wolf
Blitzer look it's a trial it's boring
most ly I've been on jury duty and I can
that's not
me that's a different guy why are you
it's not
me it may be
me look trials are a lot of procedural
and side conferences and sidebars
and what's exhibit 372a and you're not
out of order this whole CT is out of
look the one person who's had the most
normal reaction to the trial so far is
Donald Trump Donald Trump fell asleep on
multiple days during his criminal trial
as he
should I mean he's been up since 2 a.m.
rage tweeting he needs his anger
sleep today was the second day of
Trump's hush money trial and the first
witness was the editor of the national
Inquirer he testified that to help Trump
win the 2016 election he would buy
scandalous stories about Trump and then
bury them and what a great job he did I
can't think of a single Trump
scanner before they could even get into
that they had to hold a separate hearing
to find out if Trump violated a gag
order when he threatened jurors and
Witnesses and that hearing did not go
well for trump it was a pretty wild and
intense hearing on Donald Trump's gag
order it all turned into a very heated
exchange between the judge and Trump
lawyer Todd blanch who argued that Trump
is being very careful while a clearly
frustrated judge Maron responded Mr
blanch you're losing all credibility
with this court minutes after the
hearing ended Trump attacked the judge
on social media calling him a kangaroo
[Applause]
court wow this guy is incapable of
keeping his mouth shut for 2
minutes has Trump ever considered paying
himself hush money but think about it
but this this is a complicated issue
about balancing rights BAS basically the
prosecution's argument is that a juror
has the right to feel safe while serving
on Donald Trump's jury while Donald
Trump's argument is that that juror
lives at 34 West 52nd Street and maybe
someone should pay that juror a visit
and straighten him
out this gag order serious Trump might
have to pay up to
$1,000 per violation yeah $1,000 that's
not going to stop Trump from talking
okay you got to deal with this like any
other tantrum you got to give Trump an
iPad with melon on it and let him zone
out
okay then he's going to expect Coco
melon whenever he's upset okay well
we'll do have that later all right we
just need him to stop now it's so noisy
I can't even think in this house
okay it's not what Dr Becky would want
anyway for more on the results of the
gag order hearing let's go to Desi
liic
Desi D
now now that the gag order hearing is
over can get back to focusing on the
actual trial right uh unfortunately no
because during the gag order hearing
Donald Trump made a jerk off motion so
they needed a gag order hearing to see
if that violated the gag order before
they could get back to the first gag
order oh oh but then after that it's all
set uh no because during that gag order
hearing the judge heard Trump saying I'm
judge peee
head and when the judge asked did you
just call me judge peee head Trump said
he was just rehearsing for a community
theater production where he plays a
judge named pee head so then they had to
have a hearing about that but but once
that's done the actual case yes but no
because during that hearing Trump made
another jerk off motion but then he said
it wasn't a jerk off motion so they need
a quick hearing to determine how he
jerks
off then a hearing about whether he made
the jerk off motion then judge PP head
then the first jerk off hearing then the
gag order and then the actual case what
case the
hush the hush money case
oh nobody remembers that keep up with a
news cycle Jordan you're at the desk for
God's sake yes uh thank you Desi we'll
check back in with you
later
now clearly Trump thinks he's being
treated unfairly in this trial and he's
not the only one something to get order
is just the start of the oppress Trump
is
facing okay Jesse let me start with you
and the prosecution says this is
election fraud and they say pure and
simple is it I I call it pure evil so
they've taken away his freedom of speech
and now they've taken away his freedom
of movement I mean they had more
allowances for khed shik Muhammad oh
okay that sounds wild but I think Jesse
Waters is a reasonable man because I was
kicked in the head by a horse last week
so let's hear him out how is Trump being
treated worse than the Mastermind of 911
the guy needs exercise he's usually
golfing and so you're going to put a man
who's almost 80 sitting in a room like
this on his butt for all that time it's
not healthy he needs sunlight and he
needs activity he needs to be walking
around he needs action it's really cruel
and unusual pun punishment to make a man
do that
[Laughter]
are we talking about Donald Trump or an
Old English sheep
dog you can't keep him cooped up all day
he needs time outside or he'll pee on
the
couch look we all know how Donald Trump
loves exercise because of this trial
he's been morly obese for the last 40
years yeah I mean though would Trump
even want fresh air and exercise these
actually sound like the punishments the
judge would give Trump if he's convicted
yeah I know he's like fresh a and
exercise just give me the death penalty
but listen I'll give Jesse Waters the
benefit of the doubt because I was also
kicked in the head by the same horse so
let's let him continue this isn't law
fair it's torture they're making a 77y
old man sit inside a dingy room for8
hours straight 4 days a week
wow8 hours a day four days a week it's
literally torture or as the rest of the
world calls it a
job a a a part-time job to be fair I
mean this is the same guy who's asking
to be president of the United States I
mean that's got to be at least a 40 hour
a week gig I mean is he going to get
overtime also I thought Trump was
supposed to be the young vigorous
candidate in the race now what he needs
sympathy suddenly he's a poor elderly
man crippled by the weight of his own
body pulverizing his bones into dust
against the
chair you know what get that horse back
out here
because I want to give Jesse one more
chance they're telling the entire world
all the wackos this is where the former
president's going to be at this date at
this time surrounded by high-rise
buildings yes it's very dangerous for
people to know Trump's exact location
which is why he lives in a non-descript
building with his name on the
front the Trump campaign also tells us
where he's going to be and exactly when
they're called Trump rallies and it's
how I know where to go to get yelled at
and uh you know the worst part um about
him being on trial is that they're just
treating him like some he's some kind of
criminal defendant today the former
president of the United States if he
leaves Court to go to the restroom jail
if he calls the prosecutor corrupt jail
if Trump moves or says anything they
scream jail if he makes us recycling
jail if he scratches his crotch jail
yeah he gets a high score on the SAT
Jail uh his favorite Batman Christian
Bale yeah his favorite vegetable fries
yeah yeah let's begin with a major
announcement from the president of the
United States it's a good day for
America it's a good day for Europe and
it's a good day for World Peace oh a a
good day for World Peace I've wanted one
of
those I wonder what happened did the
nations of the world finally band
together to Outlaw war did they finally
buy everyone in the World a Coke is
there is there finally peace between
Kendrick and Drake what is it
moments ago at the White House President
Biden signed a long awaited Aid package
for Ukraine Israel and Taiwan into law
in total about $95 billion will go
toward assisting Ukraine and Israel's
war efforts and money to counter China's
aggression in the Indo
Pacific oh oh World Peace okay okay is
peace the one with the tanks is that the
one I I went to public school that
wasn't funded because they spent all
that money on peace so yeah I I mean
that maybe he's he's
being right yeah maybe maybe the
president is being sarcastic you know
like it's a good day for World Peace
everybody right right yes yes yes but
yes after months of delay President
Biden today signed a military aid
package for Ukraine Israel and Taiwan
yes Taiwan now there we not at War yet
but you got to book a reservation in
advance just to save your
spot and even though even though this
bill passed easily it had been held up
for six months because right-wing
Republicans threatened to kick speaker
Mike Johnson from office if he helped
Ukraine but now that he let it go
through everyone's been talking about
him like this I applaud speaker
Johnson's courage what you're witnessing
here is moral courage a profile and
courage is putting the nation above of
yourself and and that's what he did not
only put this up for a vote but he also
separated the bills which I thought was
a courageous did the right thing made
his own decision made his own decision
put his job on the line and that's
courage file and courage in this case
that's courage courage it's courage you
the word is courage profiling courage
courage profile of Courage there's a
courage thing being profile courage
so courage yeah okay thank
you so apparently Mike Johnson is the
hero here sure a couple of Ukrainian
cities fell while he decided whether or
not to be courageous but he got around
to it I mean we're always praising the
First Responders what about the eventual
responders
huh the ones who jump in their fire
truck and say hey let's stop for fro you
on the way huh where's their tick or
tape parade I salute you my John son I
mean not now but 6 months from now I
woke up the courage to do it but let's
move on to a problem that
America hasn't solved gun violence a lot
of people think the answer is reducing
the amount of guns but Tennessee
lawmakers are going in the opposite
direction chaos erupting in Tennessee
state capital where lawmakers just
passed a bill that would allow teachers
to carry concealed handguns in schools
if signed by the governor the Tennessee
law would allow teachers to carry guns
in schools where top administrators
agree the teachers would be required to
have a permit do training and get a
background check and mental health
evaluation
congratulations now your shop teacher is
going to have two stories about how he
accidentally lost a
finger look I mean can the students at
least vote on which teacher gets the gun
cuz uh you know my gym teacher was
already on a mive Power Trip and all he
had was a whistle
so today was a big day for Donald Trump
versus Johnny Law with the former
president fighting the man at every
level of the legal system but things
actually started off pretty good for
Trump uh after months of calling him
unfit for office Trump's former Attorney
General Bill bar said he's voting for
him anyway and Trump responded with as
much grace as you would expect so the
former president posting a truth social
this quote wow former attorney attorney
general Bill bar has just endorsed me
for president despite the fact that I
called him weak slow-moving lethargic
gutless and lazy based on the fact that
I greatly appreciate his wholehearted
endorsement I am removing the word
lethargic from my statement thank you
Bill
Donald Donald Trump is the king of
pettiness I am positive in an ALT
Universe Trump was a sorority president
just dripping dripping with shade like
wow bill I love that bikini you're so
brave to be wearing that you go girl I
mean it does look like Trump hates Trump
ass kisses as much as the rest of us do
because he'll be like uh Kiss the Ring
and then when they do he's like I can't
believe you kiss the ring you little
so Trump was riding that sick burn
high this morning all the way into court
where he was confronted with testimony
from the head of the national Inquirer
who wasn't afraid to spill some tea
publisher David pecker returned to the
witness stand this morning and explained
how he engineered a deal to buy The
Silence of Karen McDougall a Playboy
model who claimed she had an affair with
Trump pecker claims he had a deal with
Trump and his attorney Michael Cohen to
be on the lookout for damaging stories
about Trump he would buy stories that
were unflattering to Trump and then he
would kill them to make sure they didn't
become public was today a bad day for
Donald Trump he l look I I can't read
his mind but he looked pretty
miserable really he looked miserable
he's not one of those jovial criminal
defendants yeah coming to court with a
smile on his face and a spring in a step
as he stares down a future full of
prison gangs public pooping and shoty
heroin balloons migrating up his colon
shocker but yes David pecker pun
intended testified that he brought up
and buried negative stories about Donald
Trump that help him win the 2016
election which sounds crazy but you got
to remember this was way back in 2016
when negative stories were a bad thing
MH now we know that every new Scandal
just cancels out a different Scandal
until you become
president but because this is Donald
Trump he wasn't involved in just one
court case today while he was in New
York his lawyers were in front of the
Supreme Court arguing that Trump should
have complete legal immunity for
anything he did while president and I do
mean complete immunity if the president
decides that his rival is a corrupt
person and he orders the military or
orders someone to assassinate him is
that within His official acts that for
which he can get immunity it would
depend on the hypothetical but we can
see that could well be an official
act I object to this guy's voice
can we someone gave him a Lin or
something but I mean but sorry sorry you
may continue How about if a president um
orders the military to Stage a coup uh I
think it would depend on ime I think it
would depend on the circumstances
whether it was an official act if it
were an official act if a president
sells nuclear secrets to a foreign
adversary is that immune well I don't
know in the hypothetical whether or not
that would be an official act okay look
can we stop giving Trump IDE years
okay yeah he's listening to this like oh
selling nuclear secrets I should write
this down yeah it it sounded like they
were loose pitching Netflix action
thrillers in the room like in order to
save his Nation the president must
strangle an opponent in a public
Deathmatch Liam niss is immune from
prosecution
now very good very good very good there
we go now the Trump legal team doesn't
really believe the total immunity
argument they're just bringing it up to
delay his trials it's kind of like when
your kid asks for water at bedtime and
you know they're just trying to delay
bedtime because kids don't need
water wait so I'm pretty sure kids do
need water uh no you're thinking of
plants the wild thing is that the
Court's conservative majority seems like
it's actually going to accept at least
part of Trump's argument by the end of
the hearing the conservative majority
seemed to express a desire to create
some kind of limited immunity for
official acts for presidents so this is
where we're at the conservative justices
think Trump should have immunity the
liberal justices don't how about we meet
halfway instead of complete immunity
presidents get a hall pass of five
crimes that are totally okay if you have
the chance for example mine would be
bribery Insurrection wire fraud perjury
and Lenny krabit money
laundry I mean money laundry I got my
All Passes mixed up right yeah I mean it
is kind of crazy the Supreme Court might
actually make the president immune from
the law I mean isn't this America's
whole thing is no Kings I mean that's
why those people threw the tea in the
river I mean what a waste they could
have kept all that tea yeah that's my
main concern as well
Ronnie with all this there is still a
presidential race going on so this
morning Donald Trump made a a campaign
stop on his way into court and Fox News
was there to drink it up breaking this
morning former president Donald Trump
making a surprise campaign stop in the
last hour at a construction site in
Midtown he's taking his time with
everyone talking to people shaking hands
taking selfies look at him with this man
with the hard hat taking a picture
thanking him for being there patting his
back he grew up in New York grew up in
construction on these sites and now he's
talking to the men and women that build
New York that build all these buildings
he knows a lot about about that he's one
of
them wow he was clearly excited to be on
a construction site shake a few hands
Pat a few backs show them some Advanced
cat calling techniques you know the
whole
nine and those construction workers
appeared to really love Trump either
that or they showed up with all their
unpaid invoices so hey can I get your
autograph on this yeah can you initial
here and here please it's been years now
in recent weeks colleges across the
country have become from the site of
mass protests against Israel's war in
Gaza and this presents a challenge for
the colleges loud and even disruptive
protests are cherished tradition on
campuses and college investments in
Israel are a legitimate issue for
students but at the same time there's a
real element of anti-Semitism among some
protests and Jewish students have the
right to feel safe at their own schools
so it's a delicate balance that requires
keeping a cool head and listening
respectfully and above all the colleges
should not escalate the tension Columbia
University's president asked the NYPD to
break up a tent encampment 150
protesters were arrested at NYU in a
demonstration the university says it
asked the police to intervene okay okay
Ju Just to be clear I said
deescalate
deescalate Chaos on the campus of USC as
Pro Palestinian protesters clash with
school security and police LA police
officers in r gear move in and there are
a number of confrontations as the police
force encircles the center of Campus
okay does deescalate not mean what I
think it means uh un escalate
reverse escalate at least don't make it
worse officers were sent in at the
request of the university and under the
direction of Governor Greg Abbott Abbot
posted a social media quote the
protesters belong in jail send in the
National Guard and wake these kids
up do these ever think of a solution
besides Force I mean when this guy's
Wi-Fi goes down is he like get the
National Guard in here we need to my
modem by the way that man is Senator
joshh Holly you might remember him as
the man who riled up a mob on January
6th and then ran like a once they
showed
up
personally personally I might think
twice the next time I endorsed violence
but that's just me yeah and also Jordan
you don't use the national God because
students are camping on the quad you use
them for when aliens invade and you want
to test the aliens weapon capabilities
you know you're like how strong at La
are sending a National Guard to find out
also you're not going to resolve tension
by adding violence I'm spitballing here
maybe instead of armed soldiers why not
try sending in the college improv troop
you know a group of communication majors
in bright colored shirts asking for a
suggestion should clear out a crowd in
no
time no Jordan everybody knows that our
College improv makes everything worse
okay and as well right-wing politicians
showing up on campus to yell at the
students house Speaker Mike Johnson
visiting the Columbia campus today the
cherish traditions of this University
are being overtaken right now by radical
and extreme ideologies I am here today
joining my colleagues and calling on
President chaik to resign if she cannot
immediately bring order to this
chaos go back to class and stop the
nonsense stop wasting your parents
money yes stop wasting your parents
money be like Mike Johnson get into
government and waste everyone's
money and by the way
Mike if your problem is with
anti-Semitism I completely agree with
you that that it's completely
unacceptable but maybe start with your
coworker who believes in Jewish space
lasers I mean just I will say it's quite
a flip-flop for Republicans to be
telling New York college kids to go back
to their woke ideology
classes you shouldn't be intense you
should be studying essays on pornography
by radical feminist Andrea
dworin honestly I can't think of anybody
worse to give their opinions on how to
protest the war in Gaza well there is
one guy what's happening in America's
college campuses is a rip anti-semitic
mobs have taken over in leading
University it's unconscionable it has to
be stopped oh thanks for taking the time
to give your feedback Benjamin
Netanyahu is there nothing else going on
with you yeah I know this guy is like
the situation in US college campuses is
unacceptable do you see how the
buildings are not Rubble I am
disgusted here's the point the there's a
lot of noise and plenty of Bad actors
but fundamentally what's driving these
protests is anger over Israel's
disproportionate use of force so before
we respond to the protests with
disproportionate Force maybe we should
listen to what they have to say and then
if we still don't agree with the
students then we can send in the college
improv Troop
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