The Worst Pirates You've Ever Heard Of

BlueJay
15 Mar 202422:32

Summary

TLDRThe video script narrates the tale of Captain Johnny P RIT, a pirate captain, and his adventures on the high seas. It also delves into the life of Major Stede Bonnet, a gentleman pirate from Barbados, whose journey from wealth to piracy is filled with comical misadventures and unfortunate encounters. The script humorously contrasts the romanticized image of pirates with the harsh realities of their lives, highlighting the failures and blunders of some of history's least successful pirates, including the infamous Somali pirates who mistakenly attacked military warships.

Takeaways

  • 🏴‍☠️ Captain Johnny P RIT is depicted as a pirate captain with a dream of plundering the Spanish treasure fleet.
  • 🎮 World of Warships is a free-to-play naval game offering an authentic nautical experience with various battleships and submarines.
  • 👑 Major Stede Bonnet was an aristocrat from Barbados who turned to piracy, an unusual background for a pirate.
  • 🚢 Bonnet's inexperience led to a series of misadventures, including mistaking a Spanish man-of-war for a merchant vessel.
  • 🔥 A pirate's life was often short and brutal, with many failings and few achieving the riches and fame they sought.
  • 🤝 Bonnet formed an alliance with the notorious Blackbeard, but their partnership didn't last long due to Bonnet's lack of seafaring skills.
  • 🏴‍☠️‍♂️ The Golden Age of Piracy was a time of many would-be pirates, but only a few succeeded, with many ending in failure or death.
  • 💸 Despite being granted a pardon, Bonnet returned to piracy with a new strategy of compensating victims to mask his criminal activities.
  • 🔫 Somali pirates were known for their brazen attacks on commercial vessels, including several comical mistakes of targeting warships.
  • 🌊 Piracy has evolved over the centuries, but the underlying conditions that breed piracy, such as poverty and low social status, remain the same.

Q & A

  • Who is Captain Johnny P RIT in the context of the video?

    -Captain Johnny P RIT is a fictional young pirate character created to illustrate the adventurous and often exaggerated tales of piracy.

  • What does the video suggest about the life of pirates compared to popular tales?

    -The video suggests that the life of pirates was not as glamorous or successful as popular tales like those of Bartholomew Roberts, Francis Drake, and Blackbeard make it seem. Most pirates faced failure and miserable conditions.

  • Who was Major Steed Bonnet, and what was unique about his entry into piracy?

    -Major Steed Bonnet was an aristocrat from Barbados who unexpectedly turned to piracy despite having no seafaring experience. Unlike typical pirates who stole ships, Bonnet purchased his own ship to start his piracy career.

  • What led to Steed Bonnet's downfall as a pirate?

    -Steed Bonnet's downfall was due to his lack of seafaring and pirating experience, which led to the loss of respect from his crew and eventual capture by pirate hunters.

  • How did Steed Bonnet's relationship with Blackbeard affect his piracy career?

    -Bonnet's relationship with Blackbeard led to him temporarily giving up command of his ship to Blackbeard, who had more experience. This partnership brought temporary success but eventually contributed to Bonnet's downfall when Blackbeard left him without resources.

  • What is the significance of the King George I's proclamation in the context of piracy?

    -King George I's proclamation offered a one-time pardon to any pirate who surrendered, aiming to reduce piracy by offering criminals a chance to reform. This played a key role in Bonnet's decision to seek pardon, albeit he later returned to piracy.

  • How did Somali pirates differ from the traditional image of pirates depicted in the video?

    -Somali pirates were depicted as modern pirates using AKs and motorboats instead of swords and sailing ships, focusing on ransoming ships along the Somali coast, contrasting with the traditional image of pirates from the Golden Age of piracy.

  • What led to the emergence of piracy off the coast of Somalia?

    -Piracy off the coast of Somalia emerged as local fishermen started defending their waters against foreign vessels exploiting their resources, which eventually escalated into ransoming foreign vessels for profit.

  • What were some of the comedic errors made by Somali pirates according to the video?

    -Somali pirates made several comedic errors, such as attacking military vessels mistaking them for civilian cargo ships, including multiple instances where they attacked the French warship S mistakenly.

  • What is the video's take on the transition of piracy over time?

    -The video suggests that while the form and methods of piracy have changed over time, from the Golden Age of piracy to modern Somali pirates, the underlying conditions such as poverty and seeking freedom or wealth continue to drive piracy.

Outlines

00:00

🏴‍☠️ The Misadventures of Captain Johnny P RIT

This paragraph introduces the video's theme centered around the life of pirates, using a fictional character, Captain Johnny P RIT, as a representation of the romanticized pirate lifestyle. It humorously contrasts the imagined grandeur of piracy with the harsh realities, highlighting the often tragic and short-lived careers of many pirates. The paragraph also transitions into a plug for the game 'World of Warships,' a naval warfare game that offers a modern take on naval combat, contrasting it with the outdated equipment of historical pirates.

05:02

💥 The Unlikely Turn of Major Stede Bonnet

The second paragraph delves into the story of Major Stede Bonnet, an aristocrat turned pirate.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Pirates

The term 'pirates' refers to individuals who engage in maritime robbery and criminal acts at sea, often seizing ships and plundering their cargo. In the context of the video, it highlights the adventurous and sometimes comical tales of sea pirates, emphasizing their pursuit of riches and the reality of their often brutal and unsuccessful endeavors.

💡World of Warships

World of Warships is a free-to-play naval warfare-themed massively multiplayer online game that features detailed models of battleships, destroyers, and submarines from various historical periods. The game emphasizes strategy and teamwork, allowing players to engage in naval battles and experience a form of virtual piracy.

💡Golden Age of Piracy

The Golden Age of Piracy refers to a period in the late 17th and early 18th centuries characterized by the unprecedented rise in pirate activity, particularly in the Caribbean and along the eastern coast of America. It was a time when piracy was rampant, and many pirates became infamous figures.

💡Schooner

A schooner is a type of sailing ship characterized by its fore-and-aft rigging and typically two or more masts. It was a common vessel type used by pirates due to its speed and maneuverability, making it ideal for pursuing and capturing other ships.

💡Flintlock

A flintlock is a type of mechanism used in early firearms that creates a spark to ignite the gunpowder and fire the bullet. It was the predominant firearm technology during the era of piracy and is often associated with the weapons pirates used.

💡Treasure Fleet

A treasure fleet refers to a group of ships, often Spanish galleons, that were laden with valuable cargo such as gold, silver, and other precious items. These fleets were highly sought after by pirates for the immense wealth they carried.

💡Sailors

Sailors are individuals who work on ships and are involved in maritime activities, including navigation, maintenance, and other duties necessary for the operation of a vessel. In the context of the video, sailors are part of the pirate crew, contributing to the pirate's endeavors and often being victims of pirate attacks.

💡Cannons

Cannons are large, heavy artillery pieces typically mounted on ships that fire large projectiles over long distances. They were a crucial part of naval warfare and piracy, used to engage enemy vessels and defend against attacks.

💡Pirate Sanctuary

A pirate sanctuary refers to a location that provides a safe haven for pirates, where they can rest, repair their ships, and plan their next ventures without fear of legal repercussions. These places were often remote and difficult for authorities to reach.

💡Blackbeard

Blackbeard, also known as Edward Teach, was one of the most notorious pirates of all time, known for his fearsome appearance and brutal tactics. He is a central figure in pirate lore and is often cited as a symbol of the golden age of piracy.

💡Pardon

A pardon is an official forgiveness for a crime, absolving the recipient from the legal consequences of their actions. In the context of the video, it refers to King George I's proclamation offering pirates a one-time pardon for their crimes if they surrendered themselves by a certain date.

Highlights

The video is sponsored by World of Warships, a naval game.

Captain Johnny P RIT is introduced as the scourge of the Seven Seas.

Pirates often dreamt of grandeur but faced harsh realities and failure.

Major Stede Bonnet's unique origin as a pirate from aristocracy.

Bonnet's unusual decision to pay his crew a salary instead of sharing plunder.

Bonnet's first encounter with a Spanish man of war, resulting in a costly defeat.

Bonnet's association with the infamous Blackbeard and their partnership.

Bonnet's loss of command and subsequent reinstatement by Blackbeard.

King George I's proclamation offering pardons to pirates who surrendered.

Bonnet's return to piracy after receiving a pardon, with a new strategy of compensating victims.

Bonnet's capture and eventual execution despite his attempts to escape.

The story of Somali pirates, known for their exploits in the 21st century.

Somali pirates' mistreatment of their own fishing waters by foreign powers.

The humorous and repeated mistakes of Somali pirates attacking warships.

The absurdity of Somali pirates attacking the French command ship in the Indian Ocean.

Transcripts

00:00

this video is sponsored by World of

00:02

Warships at the height of the M the sun

00:05

pierced its cloudy prison to cast its

00:07

radiant gaze upon Captain Johnny P RIT

00:10

the scourge of the Seven Seas squinting

00:12

through the Brilliance of molten gold

00:14

Rays the young pirate swaggered along

00:16

the length of his Schooner every second

00:18

step proclaimed by the resonating clunk

00:20

of his peg leg on weathered Timbers the

00:22

splashing sea sent sparkling salty spray

00:25

showering the sun soaked smiling sailor

00:28

accenting his striking pose like a Badge

00:30

of valiance at the bow of his ship the

00:32

aspiring pirates's eyes locked into his

00:34

approaching prey the prized gallion of

00:37

the Spanish treasure Fleet and ass soon

00:38

to be first Big Score as captain of the

00:40

flintlock fiends with a wave of his hand

00:43

these poor rap scallions would bear

00:44

witness to the Wrath in Judgment of his

00:46

Schooner's payload all that was left to

00:49

invoke his trial by Iron and Flame was

00:51

one word fire while The Adventurous

00:55

Tales of Bartholomew Roberts Francis

00:57

Drake and Blackbeard paint a tantalizing

00:59

picture of life plundering booty on the

01:01

high seas the gods of statistics and

01:03

reality are always there to remind us

01:05

that pirate life was much more likely to

01:06

be a successful and abrupt as our little

01:08

friend Johnny's here as for every pirate

01:10

who succeeded in finding riches there

01:12

were dozens more who ended up as

01:14

pathetic wretched miserable failures

01:17

sometimes in many pieces that's right

01:20

we're talking piracy of the seafaring

01:22

variety so [ __ ] your Flint locks and

01:24

chase some parrot flocks because today

01:26

we're going to talk about the worst

01:27

Pirates you've never heard of

01:38

hey there buddy what you got there a

01:39

pilate ship oh wow are those cannons

01:42

yeah I'm going to be the most dangerous

01:44

pirate on the Seven Seas yeah let me

01:46

hear your best y y wow that's awesome

01:51

well good

01:52

luck dreams of sailing a Canon packed

01:54

pirate ship are fun and all but it's not

01:56

as fun as crushing those dreams in World

01:58

of Warships World of Warships is a

02:00

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02:04

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Dynamic weather and top-notch Graphics

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ensure things never get stale but I know

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02:22

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02:33

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02:34

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02:36

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02:39

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02:40

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02:42

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02:54

you World of Warships for sponsoring the

02:55

video it's 1717 the Golden Age of piracy

02:59

and major Steve Bonnet set sail for the

03:01

first time as a pirate captain and also

03:03

for the first time ever there were

03:05

numerous ways one could find themselves

03:06

pirating during the Golden Age many were

03:09

poor Sailors seized by dreams of riches

03:11

and freedom others were normal Sailors

03:13

seized by pirates for their riches and

03:15

freedom and some were seized by the roal

03:17

Navy before seizing command to seize

03:19

riches and freedom Bonnet on the other

03:20

hand Had An Origin unlike most others in

03:23

that he did not come for mediocrity but

03:25

rather aristocracy seed Bonnet grew up

03:27

in Barbados on a wealthy estate of over

03:29

4 100 acres of sugarcane fields which he

03:31

inherited at the young age of six after

03:33

his parents passed away now you might

03:35

think growing up on a farm would build

03:36

this sort of rugged and handy character

03:38

necessary for swashbuckling piracy but

03:41

this is the 1600s uh okay I know this

03:44

looks bad yeah 94 African slaves doesn't

03:46

really scream tolerant no that's not

03:48

fair I have three whites as well a

03:51

social it of society charmer of faint

03:53

Hearts major Steed Bonnet was known to

03:55

be a proper gentleman but don't let that

03:57

major deceive you he got that from the

03:58

Barbadian militia which was essentially

04:00

just a bunch of land owners who hunted

04:02

down runaway slaves like I said with his

04:05

wife and four kids he was all set to

04:06

cruise The Lazy River equivalent of the

04:08

good life but all that would change one

04:10

faithful day when he decided to take a

04:12

detour it's 8 in the morning ah that

04:16

can't be right the life sucking vampires

04:18

would be back in their coffins by now

04:19

yet instead here you are sucking down

04:21

madira wine like it's the first job

04:23

you've ever had well Mary I just thought

04:25

it was about time someone did some

04:27

sucking in this house and it's

04:28

pronounced m oh go down to the harbor if

04:31

you want to gargle the Spanish so much

04:33

Portuguese Mary it's Portuguese from the

04:36

subtropical archipelago of Madera which

04:39

spoiler alert is in the name if you put

04:42

half as much thought into this household

04:43

as you do the bottom of a bottle here we

04:46

go then Mr peppers would still be alive

04:49

how was I supposed to know the dog

04:51

couldn't tuck and roll because who

04:53

launches a dog 60 ft in the air with a

04:55

sugar cane trebuchet he had a dream Mary

04:59

what a cherished aspiration or ambition

05:02

I know what a dream is then why'd you

05:04

ask Mr Peppers died because I wasn't

05:06

sure if I just heard the most ridiculous

05:08

five-word sentence in my life since I

05:10

said yes I will marry you that's just

05:14

you're a five-word

05:18

sentence George I swear to God if you

05:20

touch my wine glass I will force feed

05:23

you rose thorns sorry

05:26

sir I also need you to go pick some rose

05:28

thorns of course in a very Bonkers and

05:31

blue jay approved midlife crisis Bonnet

05:33

decided to spontaneously abandon his

05:35

life to become a pirate many sources

05:37

claim it was because he was tired of his

05:39

nagging wife's constant yapping others

05:41

speculated it was due to the stress from

05:43

having lost a child and some theorize

05:45

that the Avid Bookworm was captivated

05:47

with Wonder lust of the pirate life from

05:48

the novels of the time but whatever the

05:50

reason I think it was pretty clear that

05:52

our little Steed had a be in his Bonnet

05:54

per se so despite having literally no

05:56

seafaring experience he set off to

05:58

Kickstart his new career on the high

06:00

seas typically the first thing every new

06:02

pirate had to do was steal a ship but

06:04

that sounded like a lot of poor people

06:05

work to Steed so he just bought one

06:07

instead after getting the other

06:08

Essentials like cannons ammunition and a

06:11

private library in his personal quarters

06:13

all he had to do was Wrangle himself up

06:14

a crew hello good sir uh you seem to be

06:17

of the rather swashbuckle

06:19

sort how would you like to join me

06:22

Pirates crew y pirate what because I

06:25

have a parrot that's kind of [ __ ] up

06:26

man what it can talk no no just knows

06:29

that one phrase that's kind of

06:32

unsettling what is your Monumental ego

06:34

threatened by the mere idea that

06:35

something you see as just an animal

06:37

could possibly be more intelligent than

06:39

you or are you just surprised by the

06:40

fact that someone told you no for the

06:41

first time in your privileged life or

06:43

perhaps is this reaction just an outlet

06:45

for how unsettled you are your own life

06:47

circumstances as a whole spanning from

06:49

the obvious contention plaguing your

06:50

marriage to the pable insecurities

06:52

encompassing your fostered resentment at

06:54

the predetermined trajectory of your

06:55

affluent life okay maybe too Brock after

06:59

Gathering a crew Bonnet kept up his

07:01

tradition of breaking pirate tradition

07:03

by paying them a salary from his own

07:04

fortune as opposed to the norm of just

07:06

splitting shares of plunder with all his

07:08

boxes checked the gentleman pirate snuck

07:10

out of his home out of the island and

07:12

out of a family that he would never see

07:14

again adjusting to the pirate life

07:15

aboard the Revenge would have been

07:17

rather interesting for Bonnet instead of

07:18

his usual lavish courses of ve caviar

07:21

and gummy worms which I only assume are

07:23

Staples of every wealthy man's diet he

07:25

would have had to settle for slabs of

07:26

salted meat dry biscuits and whatever

07:28

other crit they can scrunch up whilst

07:30

plundering booty how cute I think I'm

07:33

going to call you donatell which isn't a

07:36

reference for anything yet no it's not

07:39

that's good but I think he's more of a

07:40

bow staff guy the Pirates started their

07:42

hunt around the East Coast where they

07:43

found some success at first capturing a

07:46

handful of ships without a fight and

07:47

releasing them after they were deified

07:49

except for the Barbadian ones which in

07:51

order to keep word of his activities

07:52

from reaching home he burned to the

07:57

ground even with the profitable start

08:00

bonnet's inexperience really started to

08:01

shine in these encounters and the crew

08:03

began to lose what little respect they

08:05

had for the gentleman pirate but

08:06

hopefully all that was about to change

08:08

as they spotted a massive Spanish

08:10

merchant ship on the horizon and race

08:12

Interceptor with their Jolly Roger

08:13

raised high this is it Peter the Big

08:16

Score set the blowy sheets to Max and

08:18

let's get this booty y blowy sheet full

08:22

sale the men say full sale sorry and

08:26

these men pay your

08:28

salary blowy sheets to Max men Dave

08:32

Jones that's no Merchant vessel it's me

08:34

a Spanish man of war I mean Peter come

08:37

on we've all dabbled in red light

08:39

districts what not a man of [ __ ] Man of

08:42

War uh listen I'm not one the judge but

08:45

if you're into being eaten just don't do

08:46

it on company time no not man of war man

08:49

of war Cortez himself he's here what how

08:52

did you get Kung toor the Pirates

08:55

quickly realized they weren't facing a

08:56

merchant vessel packed with luscious

08:58

amounts of shiny metal but a Spanish man

09:00

of war packed with scary amounts of

09:02

deadly metal the ambitious hunt turned

09:03

into a rapid Retreat as the Revenge

09:05

scurried off faster than Bonnet left his

09:07

family but not before the man of war

09:09

made the sky a lot more inclusive of the

09:11

periodic table killing and wounding half

09:13

of bonnet's men including the big man

09:14

himself after their escape the Revenge

09:16

sailed towards the pirate sanctuary of

09:18

nasau where Bonnet would get to network

09:20

with his new co-workers per se aask our

09:23

gentleman pirate was well accustomed to

09:25

just like white collar networking events

09:27

the biggest criminals stood out the most

09:29

and Bonnet found himself making friends

09:31

with none other than Edward Teach

09:32

himself iconic for his rather dark andus

09:35

filled facial hair a black beard if you

09:38

will that's right the arguably least

09:40

experienced pirate in history struck up

09:42

a bromance with one of the most

09:43

notorious Pirates of all time while the

09:45

early details of their relationship are

09:47

speculative we do know that the two

09:49

captains agreed to sail together however

09:51

with bonnet's captaining skills being

09:53

about as competent as his parenting ones

09:55

Blackbeard quickly caught on to the

09:56

man's lack of seafaring expertise and

09:58

hashed up a plan all right so just hang

10:01

out in the quarters here and let me

10:03

worry about the captaining oh okay I

10:05

mean I I kind of feel like a lazy

10:07

prisoner though no no think of it as an

10:10

apprenticeship you're going to be

10:11

learning the most important part about

10:13

being a pirate y lowrisk plundering

10:16

tactics uh y spot on matey and you can

10:19

learn with uh with this Monopoly there

10:23

be no better way to learn theft than

10:25

capitalism matey uh okay and should I

10:27

also start sticking lit fuses in in my

10:29

hair what oh [ __ ] wow that could have

10:32

been bad I swear they have a mind of

10:34

their own they do anyway to work with ye

10:37

pirating be tough Work Fit for Only the

10:39

strongest men sir you're uh Missing ice

10:42

cream time you better have saved

10:43

pistachio Blackbeard persuaded Bonnet to

10:46

give up command of a ship and become

10:47

just a measly passenger aboard it a

10:49

change that was definitely a relief for

10:50

bonnet's crew the Revenge found a good

10:52

deal of success under Blackbeard oh

10:54

while Bonet kind of just hung around

10:55

awkwardly like an engineer in well pick

10:57

a social setting day after day bonnet's

11:00

command felt more artificial than a Call

11:01

of Duty code of conduct but he fell past

11:03

the point of no return in his pirate

11:05

life and even confided in some crewman

11:07

that he was tired of it and would gladly

11:08

leave it all behind to live life a new

11:10

in Spain or Portugal a few weeks later

11:12

According to some versions of the story

11:14

Blackbeard would get a new Flag ship and

11:15

separate from Bonnet after reinstating

11:17

him as Captain sailing through the Bay

11:19

of Honduras Bonnet and his men soon

11:21

found themselves face to face with a new

11:23

prize a massive 400 ton 26 Cannon

11:26

merchantman the Protestant Caesar a

11:28

score to a attractive for Bonnet to let

11:30

slip by having much more combat

11:32

experience than his run in with the man

11:33

of war the year prior Bonnet closed the

11:36

distance cut behind his pre turn in open

11:38

fire Bonnet lost the cannon fight and

11:40

retreated into the night with his

11:41

Timbers thoroughly shivered leaving his

11:43

crew to grow ever more resentful towards

11:45

their gentleman Captain who just

11:46

couldn't seem to catch a break after

11:48

making Port they just so happened to run

11:50

into Big Daddy again who proposed Bonnet

11:52

be replaced by a new captain named

11:54

Richards a proposal bonnet's crew wasted

11:57

no time in accepting having once again

11:59

lost command Bonnet was back to being a

12:01

puppet challenging Elmo's record for the

12:03

longest time spent with a hand up their

12:04

ass fast forwarding a little bit because

12:06

believe it or not there are other

12:07

Pirates I want to talk about both

12:09

Blackbeard and Bonnet decided to

12:10

surrender themselves for a pardon the

12:12

latter taking a small boat to a town in

12:14

North Carolina to do so in 1717 King

12:17

George I was getting real fed up with

12:19

the amount of swashbuckling and

12:20

deification plaguing the high seas so

12:23

being the buzz kill that he was he

12:25

issued a proclamation that provided any

12:27

pirate who surrendered themselves a one

12:29

time pardon for all their various

12:30

piratey crimes therefore any and all

12:33

Pirates Scallywags and or Marauders who

12:36

surrender thyselves before the 5th of

12:38

January in the year of our King 1718

12:41

shall be pardoned one time only for all

12:43

their crimes all crimes you say

12:46

including the most heinous does that

12:48

include stabbing Spanish people uh yes

12:51

and all other peoples as well I don't

12:53

want to Pardon for the French ones what

12:55

about eating stolen sushi with a knife

12:57

and fork the king will forgive you but I

12:59

can't say God will how about the

13:01

smearing of copious amounts of butter on

13:04

door knobs and or floors to make people

13:06

sticky that's that's not a crime that's

13:10

just weird but what if now here's an

13:12

example of said proclamation in action

13:15

as I will now pardon myself for the

13:17

murder of that little [ __ ] now I trust

13:19

you're all done wasting my

13:22

time you said you only get one

13:28

pardon

13:29

now is it a good idea to blindly Grant

13:32

pardons to some of the most violent

13:33

criminals in history I don't know is it

13:35

a good idea to pop threeyear expired an

13:38

acids when you have a stomach

13:39

ache is it when Bonnet returned to his

13:42

ship Parton in hand he found that

13:43

Blackbeard had one more surprise in

13:45

store for him the Legendary Pirate was

13:47

long gone having taken with him all of

13:49

the loot as well as various weapons

13:51

Provisions supplies and the best crewman

13:53

at this point in his life Bonnet was

13:55

what we'd call not a happy sailor and he

13:57

was said to have developed a mortal hate

13:59

hatred for Blackbeard it's believed he

14:00

initially sought revenge against his

14:02

former Ally but he failed to chase him

14:04

down and would never cross path with him

14:05

again so instead the man who had just

14:07

gotten a pardon for piracy returned to

14:09

said piracy but this time he had a new

14:12

strategy to mask his piracy he would

14:14

compensate the victims to make his

14:16

predatory looting appear like a fair

14:17

trade on paper therefore it's not

14:19

stealing it's just good business thank

14:22

you thank you okay great pleasure doing

14:25

business with you an old cable this is

14:27

worthless uh-uh uh the value comes from

14:30

your imagination check this out now can

14:35

you imagine what I could do with

14:38

this having been the victim of a

14:40

stupendous amount of comical blunders

14:42

Bonnet had become a lot more violent now

14:44

even training to kill his own crewman if

14:46

they refused to fight at times but this

14:48

renewed piracy would be shortlived as he