Weekend Update: Trump and Biden Visit Southern Border, McConnell to Step Down - SNL

Saturday Night Live

2 Mar 202403:44

Summary

TLDRThe provided video script is a Weekend Update sketch from Saturday Night Live, featuring anchors Colin Jost and Michael Che delivering witty and satirical commentary on current political events. They poke fun at President Biden and former President Trump's visits to the southern border, Mitch McConnell's retirement announcement, Senator Cindy Hyde-Smith's stance on in vitro fertilization, and Nikki Haley's struggling presidential campaign. Their humorous takes on these topics, laced with clever wordplay and exaggerated analogies, aim to entertain and provoke laughter while offering a comedic perspective on the political landscape.

Takeaways

😄 President Biden and Donald Trump coincidentally visited the southern U.S. border on the same day, leading to humorous comparisons.
😲 Trump had a tense encounter with migrants at the border, who did not share his anti-immigrant stance.
🤵 Senate Republican leader Mitch McConnell announced plans to step down in November due to clashes with Trump.
👶 Mississippi Senator Cindy Hyde-Smith blocked a bill protecting IVF access, suggesting trying to conceive with relatives instead.
👵 Doctors found President Biden to be physically fit for his age, comparing him to an 'old-timey fiddle held together by strings'.
🗳 Republican presidential candidate Nikki Haley faced pressure to drop out after poor results in Michigan.
🤖 The next Senate Republican leader is satirically described as 'a frozen embryo holding an assault rifle'.
🤷‍♂️ Mitt Romney declared he will not vote for Trump over Biden in the next election.
😂 The show mocked McConnell's perceived indifference to suffering with exaggerated metaphors.
🤣 The hosts poked fun at Biden's and Trump's advanced ages throughout.

Q & A

Who are the hosts of 'Weekend Update' as mentioned in the script?
-Colin Jost and Michael Che.
What was President Biden's reaction upon visiting the southern border, according to the script?
-He was horrified to discover it is being swarmed by criminals and rapists.
What unusual coincidence is mentioned regarding Biden and Trump in the script?
-Both Biden and Trump coincidentally visited the border on the same day.
How does the script describe Trump's appearance behind bars?
-The script humorously notes that Trump looks good behind bars.
What is the comedic misunderstanding mentioned about migrants' perception of Trump?
-The script jokes that migrants, upon seeing Trump, might think he is in a Trump costume waving them into the country.
Why is Mitch McConnell said to be stepping down as the Republican leader in the Senate?
-Many are saying he is leaving because of his bad relationship with Donald Trump.
What humorous comparison is made about Mitch McConnell's successor in the script?
-Mitch McConnell's successor is humorously described as a frozen embryo holding an assault rifle.
What is the script's satirical take on Senator Cindy Hyde Smith's stance on in vitro fertilization?
-The script satirically suggests that she blocked a bill protecting access to in vitro fertilization because, as they say in Mississippi, if you're having trouble conceiving, just try with a different cousin.
What joke is made about Nikki Haley's campaign in the script?
-Pressure is mounting for her to drop out of the race, but mostly because the dishes are piling up at home.
What is said about President Biden's physical fitness in the script?
-Doctors said Biden was fit as a fiddle in that he's old-timey and held together by strings.

Outlines

00:00

😂 Weekend Update Satire

The script is a segment from 'Weekend Update' with Colin Jost and Michael Che, a part of the Saturday Night Live (SNL) comedy show. The dialogue opens with an introduction of the hosts and quickly delves into political satire, focusing on President Biden and former President Trump's coincidental visit to the southern border, humorously suggesting it as the setup for an unconventional romantic comedy. It then transitions into a series of jokes targeting political figures such as Mitch McConnell, highlighting his decision to step down as the Senate Republican leader, with a series of humorous comparisons and situations to mock his tenure and characteristics. The segment also includes jokes about other political figures and scenarios, such as Senator Cindy Hyde Smith's opposition to a bill about in vitro fertilization, Nikki Haley's campaign performance, and humorous takes on President Biden's physical fitness and Senator Mitt Romney's political stance. The script employs a mix of current political events and exaggerations to deliver humor and satire.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Border

The word 'border' refers to the physical boundary separating the United States from neighboring countries, particularly the southern border with Mexico. In the script, President Biden and Donald Trump are mentioned as visiting the southern border, which has been a contentious political issue regarding immigration policies and security. The border is portrayed as a place 'swarmed by criminals and rapists,' reflecting the controversial rhetoric used by some politicians to characterize undocumented immigrants.

💡Migrants

Migrants are people who move from one place to another, often across international borders, in search of better economic opportunities or to escape conflict or persecution. The script references migrants as people who 'walked a thousand miles to get to the edge of this river,' likely referring to the perilous journeys undertaken by many seeking to enter the United States from Central America or Mexico. The term is used in a joking manner, suggesting that the migrants would be surprised to see Trump, who has been critical of immigration, 'waving them into the country.'

💡Republican

Republican is a term referring to the Republican Party, one of the two major political parties in the United States. The script highlights several prominent Republicans, such as Mitch McConnell, the former Senate Majority Leader, and Cindy Hyde-Smith, a Senator from Mississippi. Their actions and statements are portrayed in a satirical manner, often criticizing their conservative stances on issues like immigration and reproductive rights.

💡Senate

The Senate is one of the two chambers of the United States Congress, responsible for passing legislation and confirming presidential appointments. Mitch McConnell's retirement as the Republican leader in the Senate is discussed, suggesting that his successor may hold more extreme conservative views, described as 'a frozen embryo holding an assault rifle.' This satirical portrayal likely aims to critique the perceived shift towards more hardline positions within the Republican Party.

💡Physical

In the context of the script, 'physical' refers to President Biden's annual medical examination at Walter Reed Medical Center. The script humorously suggests that doctors found Biden to be 'fit as a fiddle,' meaning in good health, but likens him to an 'old-timey' fiddle, implying that his health is fragile due to his advanced age. This pokes fun at concerns about Biden's fitness for office given his age.

💡Trump

Donald Trump is the former President of the United States and a central figure in the script's commentary. His visit to the southern border is juxtaposed with Biden's, setting up a comedic scenario where the two political rivals coincidentally meet. Trump's hardline stance on immigration is referenced, with his portrayal as being 'good behind bars' likely alluding to the legal troubles he has faced. The script also satirizes Trump's popularity among some migrants, suggesting it would be ironic given his anti-immigration rhetoric.

💡Romney

Mitt Romney is a Republican Senator from Utah who is mentioned as stating that he will not vote for Donald Trump over Joe Biden in a hypothetical election matchup. The script acknowledges that some viewers may not remember Romney, a former presidential candidate, in a humorous jab at his relative obscurity within the Republican Party. This highlights the ongoing divisions within the party, with Romney representing a more moderate faction opposed to Trump's populist brand of conservatism.

💡Cousin

The term 'cousin' is used in a satirical and offensive manner when discussing Cindy Hyde-Smith's decision to block a bill protecting access to in vitro fertilization (IVF). The script suggests that in Mississippi, where Hyde-Smith is a Senator, people struggling with fertility issues are advised to 'try with a different cousin,' implying a stereotype of incestuous relationships in the state. This crude joke aims to criticize Hyde-Smith's stance on reproductive rights and highlight the perceived backwardness of certain conservative views.

💡Weekend Update

Weekend Update is a long-running satirical news segment on the sketch comedy show Saturday Night Live, hosted by Colin Jost and Michael Che in this script. The segment is known for its biting commentary on current events and political figures, delivered in a mock news broadcast format. The script exemplifies this by poking fun at various political figures and their actions through clever wordplay and exaggerated scenarios.

💡Satire

Satire is a literary and rhetorical technique that uses humor, irony, and exaggeration to expose and critique the vices, follies, or absurdities of individuals, organizations, or society as a whole. The entire script is a prime example of political satire, as it takes aim at various politicians and their stances on issues like immigration, reproductive rights, and fitness for office. The use of biting humor, outrageous analogies, and distorted portrayals of public figures serves to highlight and mock the perceived flaws or hypocrisies in their words and actions.

Highlights

President Biden visited the Southern Border on Thursday and was horrified to discover it is being swarmed by criminals and rapists.

Both Biden and Trump coincidentally visited the Border on the same day, which sounds like the setup for the weirdest rom com of all time.

The migrants don't like Trump, they just walked a thousand miles to get to the edge of this river, and they're probably thinking is that guy in a Trump costume waving us into the country?

Mitch McConnell, seen here catching up on news from the Middle East, announced he will step down as the Republican Leader in the Senate.

Mitch McConnell, seen here walking out of a theater after watching 12 Years a Slave, announced he will step down in November.

He'll be replaced by the current number two Republican in the Senate, a frozen embryo holding an assault rifle.

Mitch McConnell, seen here after rearranging a blind woman's furniture, gave a moving speech on the Senate floor announcing his retirement.

Mitch McConnell, seen here watching a single mother sell her blood for diaper money, made me start to admire him.

Mississippi Republican Senator Cindy Hyde Smith blocked a bill that would protect access to in vitro fertilization because, as they say in Mississippi, if you're having trouble conceiving, just try with a different cousin.

After Nikki Haley's poor showing in Michigan, pressure is mounting for her to drop out of the race, but mostly because the dishes are piling up at home.

President Biden went to Walter Reid Medical Center for his annual physical, and doctors said Biden was fit as a fiddle in that he's old-timey and held together by strings.

In an interview, Senator Mitt Romney said he will not vote for Donald Trump over Joe Biden.

Some of you may remember Mitt Romney.